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    prdiva87  37, Female, Florida, USA - 15 comments
02
Dec 2010
1:00 PM CDT
   

Feeling


About 4 days ago my boyfriend asked me to marry him and today we had a fight. Honestly I don't even remember what the fight was about. All I know is he told his brother that he is trying to teach me responsibility. I'm not a child. I would prefer it if we could talk things out but he is acting like a child and barely talking to me. Honestly I don't feel engaged at the moment. I think we need to communicate more and try to work things out.
1 comment(s) - 12:04 AM - 12/28/2010
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    lmm27295  43, Female, Florida, USA - 1 comments
29
Jan 2007
8:03 AM EDT
   

I am very upset about last night, but I am not going to raise my voice w/ you or get loud and upset and I would appreciate it you can do the same in this conversation. I am going to try to express how I feel to you in the nicest way that I know how and w/o trying to purposely upset you. Please listen to what I have to say just like I listen to you and let you speak your peace. First of all, the other night you expressed to me how when you come to me you want me to be understanding, caring, etc. I did not get that respect from you at all last night, I feel like you set all the rules that I am suppose to follow when you have issues but when it is me w/ the problem, all rules are broken. And no matter what point I try to make to you, I feel like you always try to twist it instead of really listen and trying to understand why I think the way I do. Communication, the things that are said, I understand you have your ways of thinking and that they are not like mine, but it is how you handle it and the words that are said, I am tired of the hurtful things, it is one thing to talk to me about things that frustrate you about me and its another to say the things that were said last night, you have to learn how to control your mouth b/c it is pushing me away from you. It is making me not want to be close to you. You don’t understand the fact of when you say things like you do, they are not forgotten, and I carry them with me You have top realize that we are not alike. We are different in so many ways. We think different, handle things differently, see things differently etc. We have to except that about each other. You don’t always act the way I want you to or say what I want to hear and the same goes with me. Or you say things sometimes that you think are funny but you really have a meaning behind it is where we again, have to set boundaries. There are boundaries that have to be set and have to be respected and not crossed. I have to know that if I call up Chandra and trash talk you to her that I have crossed a boundary and I have to expect that you are going to be upset, so I don’t cross that boundary. Just like w/ me, if you purposely say things to hurt me, then u have crossed a boundary and I am going to upset with you. Trying to express a concern w/ one another is going to have to occur from time to time but just down right be mean to one another is going to drive us apart. With the wedding, I am tired of being threatened. This is how I feel, point blank, if it is said again, that the wedding is called off, then that’s it, I will follow through w/ it and we will not get married, I not going through a roller coaster with this wedding. This event is suppose to be a fun and special time and it is not turning out to be like that. This is something that is very important to me and my family and I have a lot of people that is putting a lot into this for me. We have 5 months left and I don’t want to have to look back at this time with you and think of how miserable it was for me. I don’t want to keep having to harp on the wedding issue. Either it is going to get better or it won’t and if it don’t then we need to call it off b/c we have people that really care about is and this event and they are putting a lot of $ into this. If you don’t want to get married then PLEASE tell me now and I will stop it all! If we don’t think we can live together, than let’s call this off, I am going to tell you right now, I cannot stand a messy house. If this is going to continue to be an issue than something is going to have to change. I don’t ask you to clean toilets, or scrub, the shower or dust. All I ask of you is to pick up after yourself or do a load of clothes or take out the trash or jump in and help if we have guest coming or put your coat in the closet. I want a neat and clean home and if this is a problem for you then like I said, this will never work. I cannot do it all by myself. I have to work to. I cannot constantly pick up behind you. So if that is what you want then I will do it but I will be a stay at home girl. You talk about how you love that I am girly, well this is part of that package. I grew up in a messy, unorganized home 80% of my life there and I WILL NOT have my home looking like that! Trust, Trust is very important, especially considering what is getting ready to happen with us. This issue has really put a damper on that with me. I am not going to lie to you, I did search for it once I realized that there was some on the computer. I understand that you have needs. U are a man and that is understandable. What frustrates me is how you hide things, u may not realize this but it kills your creditability, it makes me question things that you tell me and I hate that. I hate that I have to pull the truth out of you. PLEASE just be up front with me and don’t hide it. It just makes it 10 times worse. When you are in the wrong, just be honest and we can work through it easier. Do you want me to hide stuff from you? It makes me think 10 times more of you if you don’t hide stuff. When I don’t feel like I can trust you, it makes me not want to be close to you. I don’t care what it is, big or small, don’t lie to me, tell me stuff before I have to find about it. I want to be able to find comfort in you and be able to let my hair down with you and I want to feel like I can tell you everything and I want to feel like if I fall or make a mistake, you will be there. I want to be that person for you. I want has to build a bond with you, not a wall. I just want you to know that I love you. I want you to truly love me, to the pt that there is nothing that we would not do for one another and I am not talking about small stuff like you always fixing my drink or me always having to get up and get something for you. I am talking about stuff that really matters. We can be a great couple if we try hard. We have got to stop giving up. I do it to. And we have got to take responsibility for our actions b/c if we deny what we do, then we will never change it and I am not talking about telling one another a problem just to cause a problem to make the other one feel bad. But we have to start admitting what our fought are so we can make them better and help each other with that instead of criticizing them for it. Its funny cause in a lot of ways our situation reminds me of Sonny and Carly as stupid as it sounds. I think we need to figure out a way to help with these problems. I am willing to do anything. I have been unhappy and buy what u said, u have too. #1. I think we need to set a goal for reading the book that I bought. I think we need to read 5 to 10 pgs a week. And we can read the same pgs, prob not together b/c we will not see that much of each other, but we can talk about what we read. This will also help to know that we are both reading them and not just saying that we are. #2. I think that we need to set aside 1 nite a week to go do something together, ex. Bowling, or we can trade off, one time is something you like then next time something I like, We should fit this in every week even if something else has to go. It is important that we start getting closer and trying to build a stronger bond. #3. On Sundays, we can both get a piece of paper and right down one good thing about that week or a praise for the other person and one disturbing thing so that we can learn from it. Do you have any ideas? This stuff may seem stupid but I am trying really hard to keep us from tearing apart.
1 comment(s) - 11:46 PM - 03/02/2007
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    shae  30, Female, Texas, USA - 1 comments
23
Dec 2006
4:27 PM EDT
   

Well were back I had a blast we did so much fun stuff while in romania and in germany i am soooo glad that my mom didn't go cuz that would of ruiend the trip sirin was our intermiter he speeks 4 languages and was a really cool guy paul was fun to have on the trip but judy was way to slow for things and had know buisness on a trip like this. the people are really poor over there they on avarage make like 150 dollars a month and stuff is not cheeper over there than it is over here Seth got his 2 front botom teeth while i was gone and did i already say that i HATE my mom oh i didn't well let me say it again there is nothing she can do to make me love her ever again I HATE her she tries really hard to make my life like misrable she says she dosn't she just needs my help yeah to do her stupied stuff for her GOD i HATE her why did i get her for a mother oh i feall realy sorry for seth becouse he still has all of his like ahead of him to live with her it was really nice to get away from her for almost 2 hole weeks hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate her
1 comment(s) - 04:31 PM - 09/26/2007
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    kittyneedsspace  32, Female, Canada - 2 comments
20
Sep 2006
4:02 PM AST
   

hay just when things seem to get brighter .. well let's say they didnt now I have choice to make to see him or not aAAAAHH what's a teenage girl to do!
1 comment(s) - 07:27 PM - 09/20/2006
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    jwopink  42, Male, Texas, USA - 1 comments
30
Aug 2006
6:18 PM EDT
   

yeah...right. like i would freaking make a journal entry public. lol
1 comment(s) - 11:47 PM - 09/20/2006
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    jess96  31, Female, United Kingdom - 1 comments
31
Aug 2006
4:08 PM GMT
   

hi every body its been ace me n my bro talked without argueing so that wos cool i had a happy time with my nanna . Well i liked today cos i think i had the nicest meal eva it was delisimo yum yum lol lol lol im wachin simpsons rigt now with my laptop on my lap thanx jess
1 comment(s) - 07:24 PM - 12/22/2006
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    car0202  64, Female, South Carolina, USA - 2 comments
09
Sep 2006
9:37 AM EDT
   

What I am afraid of most is dying a lonely women and nobody caring anything about me. All I try to do is be a good, caring person and help those that I can but it seems that its never good enough. I'm scared of my children hating me. I never see them and they hardly ever call me. I just feel so alone in this world with no one to talk with or turn to. My mother has recently found out that her cancer is back and I fear the worse for her. She's the only one that I feel that I can turn to or talk with and now that this is upon her I can't dump my problems on her. I feel that I've totally screwed up my whole life.
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    Trace  59, Female, South Carolina, USA - 6 comments
05
Jan 2010
8:35 AM CDT
   

New Year 2010!!

Well I need to try to post way more often.� Well...it's a new beginning!� Tracee didn't go to Mid Winter Recess (in Dallas, Tx) as her father did not come thru and he promised.�� As a matter fact, no one has heard from him since he promised the money by Dec. 15th (2009); it's now Jan 5th, and he has contact her at all...NOTHING!� He's a piece of work!!

2 comment(s) - 12:08 PM - 03/20/2010
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    LivingWaters  44, Male, Canada - 1 comments
03
Sep 2006
6:12 AM MDT
   

August 8, 2006 By: Jeffrey Smith FCD Field Assignment Final Paper Outreach To Parika Village, Guyana, South America Luke 2:52 And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man. Stage One: Entering The Community After a short flight delay God gracefully got us through the Airports. Kim (Canadian) Kerone (Jamaican) and I (Canadian) arrived in Guyana Thursday night June 1ST 2006, and were met by Neeloyani (Beno), Ravenna and her dad Moses. I prayed that God would show me what He sees that I should be aware of since I was in a totally unfamiliar Country. This is a principle we learned in Jamaica from Darrel Miller’s teaching, to ask God what He wants us to see, to put on His glasses. We drove back in the night so we didn’t see a lot of scenery, but our driver Moses pointed out the El Dorado Rum factory, which is one of the nations biggest destructive strongholds. He also pointed out the new Cricket Stadium called Providence; my prayer is that this facility will be used freely by Christians to host large evangelistic nationwide prayer meetings! We also saw a large Hindu false god statue, and lots of different coloured Hindu flags in the corner of peoples front yards. Another thing I noticed was that most Muslims painted their houses green and white with star and crescent moon emblems carved into their concrete fence work. We drove by numerous Christian Churches, Mosques, and Hindu Temples; apparently everyone lives together despite their beliefs! This is written in their coat of arms: One People, One Nation, One Destiny. The Bible warns us about false gods in the 10 commandments; Exodus 20:3-5 Thou shalt have no other gods before me. 4 Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth: 5 Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me. I can identify with the Psalmist in Psalms 119:104 Through thy precepts I get understanding: therefore I hate every false way. We arrived in Parika at 12:15am and the place looked like a deserted ghost town. Timothy (Beno’s son) greeted the team as we drove up to the YWAM Guyana base, and we prayed through the house and I anointed all the doorposts with oil. It is advised by Alistair Petrie to sanctify and dedicated any new living space (whether hotel or friends house) to the LORD by praying throughout the rooms. I fasted all day so I would be in tune with the Holy Spirit, after prayer I felt comfortable and decided to eat some Guyanese food and fruitcake. To be honest I ate the whole cake, I asked for more so Beno said I could eat it all and I did, then Kim walked by and asked for her piece…I felt really bad about not saving her any oops. The next day we walked through the community to get familiar with our surroundings, and started to build relationships. We were spying out the land and trying to see what was going on behind the exterior scene in the physical and spiritual realm. At 7:00pm we went to the Parika Baptist Church for their second night of joint prayer meetings, where five different Churches were represented. The Pastors shared what God wants for this community and it was such a timely blessing for us because God had already begun preparing the church for community development by way of unity. Pastor of Faith Community Church, Motie Singh the Mayor and “man of peace” formally welcomed us to Parika Guyana. God used this wonderful opportunity for Kim to make our team and vision known to the community! Proverbs 29:18a Where there is no vision, the people perish. Let people know what your goal, and purpose is for being in their community, so they will know how to assist you. They talked about issues such as schools giving out condoms to students encouraging premarital sex, the problem with illegal squatters settled where they please, and the importance of owning land. 1 Corinthians 6:13 Now the body is not for fornication, but for the LORD; and the LORD for the body. The Pastors spoke about making a difference in all areas of society for the glory of God. I was so excited to see how God works; they were talking about everything I just learned in my lecture phase as if they were there. The churches joined groups and all prayed together in unity. The next day we ate lunch at Pastor/Mayor Moties house and learned different things about their culture like what foods are the nations staple diet, this is what it means to go into a community as learners. Then the five churches met together again at our house at 3:00pm for the “International Prayer Day”, and Parika’s 1st ever unity “Prayer Walk for Jesus”. We set up large sound systems and microphones on the back of trucks to sing worship music and declare Jesus Christ to all the community! All the Pastors and church leaders came onto our property to cleanse and purify the land by dedicating it to the LORD, and did spiritual warfare! 2 Corinthians 10:4 For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds. They let us know that we have their support. We then walked down the street in a big crowd handing out tracts and stopping to pray at all the different spheres of society, because community development affects and influences all areas of society. The pastors took turns praying at different locations, Schools, Markets, Businesses, Government buildings, Police Station, Health Center and Post Office! The family (Dave, Dana, Ethan and Evan from USA) arrived during the prayer walk, and Yashen came the next night, James never made it. Our team took time to get to know each other and build relationships. Kerone was saying that he loves Guyana so much that he wanted to extend his visa and live here (this was only the first week)! Robin Thompson taught us that community development starts with the individual, and then the community. Our team continued to meet regularly throughout the outreach at 8:30am for team time of prayer and devotions. Monday was our day off and Friday we had a special family breakfast prepared by the person who led devotions for that week. Each person was assigned daily duties whether meal preparations or clean up, we all helped to get things done and worked well together. I learned a lot about community living this outreach and am sure it has equipped me for long-term ministry. I am eternally changed! We did an evaluation of the entry stage by asking how we felt as a team and assessed how we were adjusting to the new culture. We felt that God had just opened doors up for us to be able to learn as much possible about long-term development in such a short time. Stage Two: Mobilization Psalm 48:12-14 speaks about God being our guide unto death. We split into groups to go about the community to do spiritual mapping. The Apostle Paul did spiritual mapping in Athens, it is where you go around an area gathering information about the community, and it’s a valuable spiritual warfare tool. Kerone and I talked to a man who turned out to be a Deacon of the Mt. Hebron Congregational Church, and discovered a brand new Community Center just being built. He was a man of peace and knew lots of history about the community, we asked him what some felt needs were and he said better maintenance of the existing infrastructure, pure breed animals and livestock due to the continual cross breeding, and of coarse water lines reaching Hyde Park where we also live. We talked to Donald Taylor about some strongholds of the land and he said that people are making their cars their idols and washing them on Sunday instead of going to church. He explained that drinking and drugs are a problem, and that the streets are a different story at night filled with drunks partying. Romans 13:13 Let us walk honestly, as in the day; not in rioting and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness, not in strife and envying. Unfaithful marriages are ruining relationships all over the country because men and woman are sexually active with many partners. Proverbs 6:32 But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul. This man invited us into his house to meet his wife and we prayed holding hands in the middle of their dining room. We went up the road waving at people and talking to shop owners. At the end of the road we saw a Hindu Temple and lots of Hindu flags, most people were friendly but others were hard faced and ignored us. There were beautiful houses, and run down houses right beside each other. Our team learned in our lecture phase the importance of stewarding the land God gave us, so we worked on many projects on our property to aid the pioneering that needs to be done. I think the two boys Ethan- 5 yrs. and Evan 3- yrs worked the hardest of us all they did everything from using a cutlass to building planes. Work is a part of worship so every time I swung a cutlass when chopping bush and clearing grass I did it unto the LORD. We cleared moss of the concrete pad out back, installed a new water tank, put up a brand new fence on one side to keep cows and other animals off our land. We dug a foundation ditch for the concrete fence out front, and cleaned the YWAM sign on the bond (Shed) and cut the tree so it is visible. We reorganized the bond, and put a couple of trailer loads of sawdust on the grass to prevent weeds and bush from growing. In fact every time we turned around it seemed that our lovely neighbour blessed us with another trailer load of sawdust, this wasn’t our favorite thing to see since we had to shovel it all out into wheel barrels and dump it in the yard while we were trying to focus on other projects. We broke 4 hammers, and I broke a shovel handle, a pitchfork prong, blew a stereo by plugging it into the wrong currency, and one unbreakable plate. I wasted many hours at the Stelling trying to get long beams for free to build a bridge onto our property, they kept telling us to come back in a couple weeks and when we got back they would be gone. We never did get any wood from them. I learned a valuable principle that you can’t rely on people to honor their word and you have to be persistent if you want something done from people. People must be motivated to do things. We prayed and asked God what projects He would want us to do, instead of just doing what we felt needed to be done. We came up with a free clinic but it wasn’t a felt need because they already have a Health Care Center here. There is no running water that reaches our area so we decided to investigate and find out why not. After talking to the Mayor and others you get a totally different reason from everyone you ask, but it appears that they are working on it to some degree, and there is not much we can do to speed up the process. Our team prayed and felt the neighbours needed fresh rainwater instead of using the dirty contaminated trench water, which was actually making them ill, so God provided the funds to buy them a water tank and install gutters to catch water! When this project was finished we went next door and taught them that Jesus is the Living Water, and prayed with them. The Mayor asked us if we would come to a meeting about the new Community Center, they were given the building by SIMAP a Government funded organization. The project was funded 100% by them but they contribute 95% of the labour and the community is suppose to do 5% of the work to take ownership of the project which is a community development principle that protects against paternalism. We set a date to work on the fence to fulfill the required 5%, when we went only a couple people from the community showed up so we cleaned the place up by getting rid of scrap materials, garbage, bush and weeds. People say they are going to do things but when the time comes to do it they are nowhere to be found. I cleared a large overgrown area out at the back and uncovered the Tomb of a former NDC chairman (Mayor), so I told present NDC Mayor Motie that I cleared a spot for his grave and he said I can’t take his place as Mayor, and he’s not getting buried there! I felt like a tomb raider it was interesting, an FCD principle is that community development workers are like archaeologists you never know what you may uncover! The Mayor stopped me another day and asked me to go down to the Community Center and arrange another workday to put up the fence. People told me they were going to be there to work and when that day came nobody showed up. I worked anyway and realized that they wanted me to do all the work for them, and they were depending on us to finish it for them. This is the paternalism SIMAP was trying to avoid. We were having team time one morning and the Mayor interrupted and invited us to another meeting (he kind of looks like Rick Morranis from Honey I shrunk the kids), but we decided to pull out of this project so they can take back the responsibility. Our neighbour had a flag hanging at her gate representing the worse kind of Hindu god Kali which is demonic, so we prayed for her and at a latter date she asked us for a knife when she had a Pastor at her house praying for her property. Yashen Kerone and I prayed over the knife that it would be used for the glory of God to remove anything that offends Him and she cut down the flag with it! The spiritual atmosphere was beginning to change around our house and now almost every neighbour plays worship music especially on Sundays! We pray for our neighbours continually and they send us provisions and fruits out of their poverty some still give. We used the LePSA method learned in our lecture phase to assess the situation and determine our seed project, as mentioned we talked to people to identify problems they are facing. We saw that the Hydronie Market was filthy with garbage, so we prayed and felt God would honor this as our seed project. We did some research in order to find out the person in charge of the market and made an appointment with him, he’s the next community’s Mayor (Milton Dookie). We were starting to realize the influence and support we were getting from the Government. We talked about the garbage issue and found out that it was an issue very close to his heart, and something that would probably take generations to correct because the peoples mindsets have to change. We came to the conclusion that getting the vendors together and holding an open forum to discuss issues of concern would be important. We had to find out what the peoples felt needs were. It turned out that their felt need was that the Parika Market should be cleaned first so we inherited the task of cleaning them both. We prepared by handing out flyers which the market committee actually printed out for us and took ownership in distributing over half of them, we handed out the other half door-to-door and a shop owner gave us money to buy garbage bags. The goal is too see people developed, and children not throwing their garbage wherever they want. The people must develop with the Village, as it is becoming a Township soon. We learned that what we wanted to do was only a small part of what really needed to be done. When we had the market meeting the market was shut down for the day, we took the opportunity to mobilize the vendors to help us clean garbage or as Yashen puts it “community beautification project”. Out of this meeting a five-person committee was formed by the people to help sustain the cleanliness of the Market. We have to give this committee vision because as the Bible says in Proverbs 29:18 Where there is no vision people will perish, where there is no vision the committee will perish. The committee can take ownership of future projects and enforce no littering, and work on getting a fence put up around the back of the Market and so on. When Yashen introduced herself at the forum she said she was a missionary, I just said my name and country, but when I started talking a man said you must be a missionary too! Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth will speak Matthew 12:34b. You shall know them by their fruits Matthew 7:16. This Seed Project turned out well, we had a couple people from the community come and others from the NDC (Neighbourhood Democratic Council), and the two market security guards. We cleaned the visible garbage up by noon and the Mayor provided lunch for us all. I asked all the vendors to use boxes for the customers and themselves to throw their garbage in to keep the place clean. We identified some early adapters and early followers who were very helpful and good company. A few guys from the church hung around a lot and some of us went to their weekly prayer meetings and different events. I usually went to 3-4 services at different churches each Sunday to build relationships with people and just be a part of the congregation and learning from them. I went with an assistant Pastor (Rabbi) on his produce pick up route to the Back Dam to see how the average farmer and seller makes money. I learned a lot about the Guyanese culture from him and tried a variety of new fruits thanks to him, the Guyanese have many resources. The roads need a lot of work, but have come a long way as people used to have to take a boat into the Back Dam. I evaluated myself to see if I was changing at all and realized that when I came to Guyana I didn’t eat any vegetables and now I will try different ones and eat them regularly, I have tried some different fruits as well. When evaluating the team I noticed that we are making new friends and building relationships quite well, people are stopping by the house and talking to us on the streets. Stage 3: Implementation In our attempt to get to know the community more and gain influence we started visiting other important areas of society. Kerone Yashen, and I went to the Health Center to learn more about their services and to see if there was any way we could help them, there wasn’t any programs they wanted us to help with so Yashen prayed for a girl who is thinking about going to nursing school. We went to the Police Station and asked if we could pray for them, and the Sergeant who is a Christian saw us at church the week before. He invited us into his office and called the other officers in and they were scared of us (because they know the power of prayer), they also brought in 4 prisoners from lock-up! I stood behind the Sergeant’s desk and Kerone said to me “hit it”, so I prayed for the 12 or more people in the office and that started a friendship with the Sergeant. He told us that 99.9% of the Police force is lodge men (Freemasons) who worship satan. Proverbs 4:19 The way of the wicked is as darkness: they know not at what they stumble. Proverbs 11:18 The wicked worketh a deceitful work: but to him that soweth righteousness shall be a sure reward. He also felt that people were doing witchcraft against him to get him killed. We continued to identify problems and ask God to reveal the root of the issues. We observed problems with child abuse, drunkenness, adultery, family feuds, idol worship and poverty. The root of many issues is generational in origin, and people are intimidated by family persecution, which prevents them from breaking away from false religions! Numbers 14:18 The LORD is longsuffering, and of great mercy, forgiving iniquity and transgression, and by no means clearing the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fouth generation. We then could pray more effectively for God to deal with them. Missionaries can’t develop a community, the people have to develop it themselves, we help facilitate the change and encourage the future leaders. There is a Wesleyan Church Kim and I went to that is in horrible shape, the building is falling down but they built another concrete building around the old wood one, but there is no roof. I told Kim I wished we could help, and mentioned it to Motie and he said he offered to help put the roof on but the pastor never responded. The person in charge needs to take responsibility for what God has entrusted them with or God will take away what little they do have. We helped out Faith Community Church by doing their Day Camp with them for five days; there were over 400 people involved. I believe large VBS camps like this are good to get involved with because you have the opportunity to develop the next generation of leaders! We gained favor with these young people from 5-18 years old, and the unity from different churches was great and even Hindu kids came to hear the Word of God. When I walk down the street kids call me sir, or brother Jeff and their parents say hi it’s a great way to gain favor with the community. The kids come from different backgrounds and some can’t read, some are heavily abused, raped etc. You learn a lot about society by interacting with the children! Our goal is to instill Christian principles and values into their lives, and teach them how to grow in Christian principles. We also strengthened our relationships with the church members; we ate lunch at Pastor/Mayor Motie’s almost every Sunday. They also gave me the opportunity to speak at their youth camp about substance abuse, Kim taught a session on missions, and Yashen taught two classes dance, and drama. Some young people made a commitment to follow after Jesus at these camps too Glory is to God! Romans 10:9 That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the LORD Jesus, and shalt believe in thy heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. Kerone Dave and I got to go with some members of Faith Community Church to a place called Foul Mouth to build a Church. We built it from the foundation up in 1 1/2 days, I was so impressed to watch these godly men work so hard and fast. People watching us knew we were Christians just by the way we worked and especially because there was no arguments. We stayed at a Baptist Camp in Goshen and had a great time of fellowship with each other, we built lasting relationships. The group had so much fun together it was like a big Italian family. People are waiting to share their heart with you, we must be willing to take the time to show them love and encourage them in their walk with Christ. What a privilege it is to be an Ambassador of Christ to the nations! We evaluated our work by looking over what we had achieved and found it very productive and rewarding to hear from spiritual leaders that we worked harder than most missionaries they’ve meet. The idea is not that we are better than others but it shows that we put our best foot forward to serve God on this outreach. 2 Timothy 4:7 I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith. Stage 4: Advanced Implementation God has given us the opportunity for us to speak into our neighbours lives. We have sound relationships so we can now try to correct them when we see their errors. Our next-door neighbours were beating their kids one day and Kim went over there and told them to stop, these kids were screaming and we heard smack after smack it was chilling. Kim has had the opportunity to comfort the children on different occasions. The parents felt embarrassed and hopefully convicted of their cruelty. The lady has opened her house up for prayer meetings and Bible studies. We brought her to church once and her daughters on several occasions. We went as a team to her new house thanksgiving service also. We have tried to impart vision into the lives of young people here and pray they will do a DTS and take ownership of the godly activities going on in the community. Whenever we worked the neighbours watched and admired the way we worked hard. I occasionally see them doing something for their lawn, or helping someone else and encourage them that they are doing a good job. This is the whole idea of community development, to show them that they can make a difference if they are willing to try. Luke 9:62 And Jesus said unto him, No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back is fit for the Kingdom of God. We ministered as a team the last three Sundays and I was given the awesome responsibility to preach in 4 different Churches during this outreach. God used us to encourage the Pastors and leaders of the community. We tried to always lead by example. We impacted the community for the good of all the people around by setting good examples. Alistair Petrie taught us in his book Transformed the concept of A.O.K. (acts of kindness), and we displayed this to our neighbours by giving them water and pots and cooking utensils, and let them use our refrigerator when they needed things kept cold. 1 John 3:18 My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth. Stage 5: Withdrawal From The Community Community development takes a long time usually 3-10 years to work yourself out of a job; in that time you train somebody to take your place. This outreach gave us a good taste of what community development involves. Although the team is leaving Guyana after 2 ½ months Kim is staying to pioneer YWAM Guyana in Parika for long term. Kim has been in Guyana for the past 14 years working with YWAM when it was in the capital city of Guyana Georgetown. She is the current director. People are starting to play Christian music along our road, and ask us for Bibles and ask questions about God. The whole area is starting to acknowledge God more I believe. The community however still needs lots of work, they don’t show up for community projects, and many still show no interest in doing the right things. The people still need to gain vision for the community, and learn to work toward the intentions of God. Even know the Churches have been united and they have a regular Pastors board meeting, they lack relational unity. Some Churches haven’t responded yet to the unity of the Churches, and some still fear that they will lose their youth to another fellowship. The leaders I have worked with are training others to be leaders already; they are trying to break them out of their box (comfort zone), and encouraging them take the Gospel out of the 4 walls of the Church. We saw Parika and God saw the beach! We were in Parika for over 2 months and at the very end with 1 week to go we found a gorgeous beach with nice sand, perfect for watching sun sets, and we saw a fight. We learned that when you are supposed to do spiritual mapping it is recommended that you explore all avenues! Everything happens for a reason so I trust that if God wanted us to find the beach called Bushy Park any sooner we would have…I still think it would have been a great place for ministry! I never did get to swim there, but the family did. We started our outreach by getting welcomed by the corporate body of believers in Parika, and left by getting a farewell by a corporate gathering of the different youth groups. Psalm 133:1 BEHOLD, how good and pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! When the body comes together in corporate relational unity, they will begin to see the power of the HOLY SPIRIT moving in their midst and Transformation start to take place. There were over 60 people who came together for a time of social fellowship and a bond fire. The people thanked us for coming and gave testimonies of how we impacted their lives. Our team gave them encouraging words and I told them they are an army, which could do great things for God if they stay united! I was able to impart the basic concept of community development to a young man named Gavin and he said he is willing to take up the challenge of running with the vision of keeping Parika clean. This is the key principle of FCD to train others to take ownership of the projects to reach God’s intentions for a community. This brother seemed to show up at the different projects regularly and I hope he’ll do a DTS and be used powerfully by God! 2 Timothy 4:6 For I am now ready to be offered, and the time of my departure (from Guyana) is at hand.
1 comment(s) - 09:20 AM - 08/09/2012
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    ladybug20  37, Female, Canada - 2 comments
04
Nov 2006
3:08 AM PST
   

busy, busy busy ... I moved to Richmond last weekend ...very stressful. But I no longer have to commute in rush hour ...THANKGOD! The further away from Chilliwack I get ...the better. But it's lonely out here ...not knowing anyone. Okay well I know a couple people, but im not out with friends every Friday and Saturday. Something im not used to. But I do feel better knowing that Jay has no clue where I live. Life is much better, but very different. Anyways im at work and I have lots to do ...apparently I have taken over Krissy's position as the everything woman so im running around like a chicken with my head cut off, lol!
1 comment(s) - 01:18 PM - 11/04/2006
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    redshotlizard  35, Female, South Carolina, USA - 4 comments
27
Jan 2010
3:58 PM HNT
   

Good things Happen when you care about taking action to help them happen!

�This quote is totally true. I went through a lot of ups and downs this past year. I had so much going for me and ironically, at the same time, so litle going for me. I had a dead end job with so little hours that I could barely afford to pay for my phone.

�I remembered getting sick a year ago (my illness took a big affect on me)�and having to leave my previous job that gave good hours and good pay. That was such a bummer on my part. I had crazy litle incidents that scared me from myself because of my illness. I thought things could not get worse and then I discovered that my grandpa is dieing. Things were very rough and my road was rocky. But, even though I was going through a hard time, I was doing everything in my power to help my situation. I took action a few ways. I applied everywhere I could find that was hiring. I went to job fairs. I even looked online. At times I almost lost hope because I wasn't getting interviews and I wasn't getting where I wanted to be. As time went on I started to get more and more hopeless.

�Lets rewind a little.. I started dating this boy, his name is Kevin, in April. Through my hardship he stood by me and gave me advice and told me to keeping pushing on and never give up. I took his advice and didn't give up. One day, actually a couple days ago, I got a call for an interview at a Theater. The guy that called me, the manager, was really nice on the phone. I was so excited and went to the interview. At the interview I was very confident and happy. I seemed to be of liking to this place because days later I was asked to come work for them. I was all smiles and jumping for joy. I got a job and realized that determination does pay off. My boyfriend helped me realize that I can do anything I put my mind into. He stood by me while I was going through some rough times.

�The job issue wasn't the only concern that I handled. I was also dealing with my illness. I have a Depression Disorder that is one level below being diagnosed as Bipolar. So I really don't see things as a normal person would. I deal with things differently and situations that may seem like no big deal are actually a huge deal to me. THis is a mental disorder that is hard to live with and I been on many different kinds of medication for it. I also tried no medication but my doctor reccommended me to go on meds because I didn't feel good and my condition got out of hand many times. Throughout all the concerns II delt with over the years, I had determination to make the best of the situations. Handling these situations were not easy but I didn't give up. My doctor found some medication that helps me function and I check in with him whenever something goes wrong. And I found a job that helps me pay for the things I need. Additionally I found out that my boyfriend will go to the end of the world for me just to make sure that I am not just alright but wonderful. I didn't give up on me and my boyfriend didn't give up on me. My boyfriend really loves me and I really love him too. :) I thank God that He helped me though my hard times, when I think I'm all alone and no one is there for me, God shows me otherwise. I am so Blessed. The sweet thing is.. my boyfriend has faith in me and knows I can do great things. He says I amaze him. Sometimes I amaze myself with all the things I discover I can do. It's great to know someone is on my side and supports me. Just know this: If I didn't care a whole lot, nothing would have gotten better. For the fact I cared about helping to beter my situation and taking action, things got better.

�Thank you to God for putting people like Kevin in my life. It is literally a miricle what you show me and teach me. I know you put me down this hard path to teach me a lesson and I have learned a lot of valuable lessons. I'm grateful for all I have and all the work you do in my life. I give you all the honor..ttyl soon <3 P.S. to top it off my totally sweet boyfriend surprised me with a rose this afternoon. I love his surprises, he is such an amazing guy. --{--@ Elizabeth

1 comment(s) - 11:43 AM - 03/20/2010
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    mccreight29  51, Female, Georgia, USA - 20 comments
30
Jan 2010
11:59 PM EDT
   

20�again I cant do this often but here is the latest.. We had a VBIED go off while I was asleep. I wasnt sure at first what happened but grabbed me gear and went to work. We had patients arriving in minutes and there was alot of blood. I was surprised that I was not affected. I was even moresurprised at the people who did lose their minds. for hours we stayed on our feet.. holding pressure.. doing sutures.. bandaging wounds and whatever else was needed. When we released my patients who were locals they wanted pictures with me. thanked me for being so caring.� .. gotto go.. patient came in

3 comment(s) - 08:16 PM - 02/07/2010
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    DancingButterfly  46, Female, New York, USA - 1 comments
21
Sep 2006
7:30 AM EDT
   

I haven't been very motivated this week. Probably due to the lack of client work for the group recently, and the fact that there's no longer a bus stop right in front of my apartment that takes me directly to the subway station. Have been working from home 2 days this week.. =p I was pretty productive on Monday and actually made 2 full meals though!! First time in a year I think, since I started traveling to Minneapolis last summer. =) The dropping of oil price and rally in the stock market have not been helping our business, so people have been "borrowed" by other groups to keep chargeable. As of last week, my options are Michigan, Atlanta, and some other unknown city in midwest. Pretty exciting isn't it? I am still in the state of hating travel since the last engagement, so hopefully I don't get to be shipped out again too soon...
1 comment(s) - 06:40 PM - 09/26/2006
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    sublettt30  69, Female, Texas, USA - 1 comments
23
Oct 2006
9:47 AM EDT
   

People usaually pretend because they don't know who they are. Once you find your purpose and who you are then you don't lie to your self.
1 comment(s) - 03:39 PM - 10/23/2006
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    mileylover5  28, Female, California, USA - 4 comments
04
Jun 2007
11:16 PM PST
   

hi
3 comment(s) - 04:56 PM - 02/18/2008
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    Laurie6806  55, Female, Canada - 1 comments
23
Sep 2006
4:15 AM EEDT
   

I expect others to be themselves, but to be honest
1 comment(s) - 11:28 PM - 12/09/2010
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Current Tags: Expectation. lying, Honesty

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    JamminAZ  26, Male, California, USA - 1 comments
11
Sep 2006
6:15 AM C
   

I am sometimes afraid of being alone by my self. Like If my parents are go and brothers I am scared inless they are close and It would be like 20 minutes. I am scared about being home alone because a rober could brake in. I am also scared because I have now one to play with or to protect me.
1 comment(s) - 06:32 AM - 09/26/2006
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    cskbs3  47, Female, California, USA - 1 comments
11
Sep 2006
6:42 AM PST
   

I am afraid of being lonley, surviving disasters, seeing my children grow up in a bad enviroment, spiders, people with no heart.
1 comment(s) - 07:35 AM - 10/12/2006
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    SavanaSSantos  31, Female, California, USA - 18 comments
14
Dec 2006
7:29 AM EDT
   

1 comment(s) - 11:50 AM - 12/18/2006
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    courtney  28, Female, California, USA - 2 comments
13
Sep 2006
1:46 PM EDT
   

hey every one!! my name is courtney! im 11 and in 6th grade.
2 comment(s) - 12:26 PM - 06/07/2007
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