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    bookunread  22, Female, California, USA - 2 entries
28
Aug 2016
11:17 AM PST
   

Hurting

I really wish someone could just know the feeling i'm having nd tell me what to do. My heart feels like it is actually �breaking, but i could never tell him that. There's so much i want to get off my chest and tell him, but i dont. I feel like if i do say something, i'll look weak. Like i have nothing better to do than to sit around and dwell on everything. Like i am ulitmately on giant burden in his life. I also don't want to start a fight, i mean it's bad enough i feel this way, he should either. part of me even feels like even if i do tell him, that he won't change anything. I sit up at nnight trying to fall asleep wondering if he's thinking about me while he's out til 6 in the morning drinking, which he has found to be his favorite hobby apparently.
I don't even want to say the words 'Break Up' out loud... �but boy have i thought them. I really am hoping he's just doing this for the first week and will soon settle down... that's what i'm praying for atleast... But how can you put a person through so much pain and not even seem to notice.... how can you go hours without �calling or texting and just assume that i get it or i don't mind. How can a boy who means so much to you treat you likr you mean so little... how to you fix a hurting heart?

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Current Tags: boyfriend, heartbroken, love, myself, relationship

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    DustyRose  40, Female, Indiana, USA - First entry!
02
Jun 2017
2:13 AM EST
   

What would you Do?

I have been in this relationship for a little over a year. I have forgiven him for cheating in the beginning when I was already living with him. We have come so far from them, but just recently I caught him talking shit about our relationship to a female friend. I confronted him about it and he was pissed said I was spying on him or getting all of his messages some way. All I did was wait for him to pass out and check his phone. I have tried everything to get passed all the other shit, but no matter what I do he makes me feel like it is all my fault, but can never give me an honest answer as to what I have done wrong. I know the old adage that if he is accusing me of shit it is what he is actually doing it. If that is the case then why keep me around if he wants something different?�
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Current Tags: cheated, clarity, help, Love, romance

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