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China 31, Female, Tennessee, USA - 7 entries

May 2008
9:39 PM CDT

Questions

�

idk wat 2 do. its like i can't get ova him no matta how hard i try. sumtimes i feel like i wana cry about it but mi emotional engine won't let me i guess its tryn 2 tel me dat cryn ova him nd about da situation ain't gne make it betta but i stil dnt kno wat else 2 do cuz i stil have feelns 4 him n their da kind u have 4 sum1 wen ur n a relationship wit sum1. i neva told him or anyone but i did love him nd i stil do n i think dats 1 reason i can't get ova him cuz b4 i met him i waz lukn 4 sum1 2 love n care about nd have dem care about me bak n he showd dat. he did but sumtimes wen i think about it i keep questioning miself did he really care or wuz it all a lie..It seems like he knew wat i waz goin through nd exactly wat 2 do 2 bring me back dwn nd knew if he did it long enuf it wuld take me 4eva 2 get over it cuz i been wantin it 4 so long n 2 bad..well i dk how he did but he did he knew dat i wantd 4 sum1 2 care 4 me n give me dat comfort i waz lukn 4.I feel kind of dumb cuz i fell 4 it nd now i can't even stop thinkin about him 4 dat long its like evrytime i dnt think about him i jus want him more nd i miss him more nd i realize how much i really did love him nd cared 4 him.I neva knew dat mi feelns 4 him or anybody culd b diz deep.Their so deep dat it got me 2 scared 2 try anotha relationship cuz i got dat fear again nd its deeper than b4.I wish der wuz a way i culd get ova him but i guess dere isnt unless he.........idk...im tryn 2 b strong but all i wanna do is cry nd i still have dat letter i wrote him nd sumtimes i read it 2 remind miself y i wanna cry nd y i still think about him........so what do i do? i guess we'll neva b.....

Tags: heartbroken, hurt, stuck

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China 31, Female, Tennessee, USA - 7 entries

Apr 2008
9:12 PM CST

Unfair

i think its kind of crazy when you give your all into something� and it still don't come out right. its just like baking a cake you follow all the directions and still don't come out right. so i guess you can say relationships and baking are some what alike but i find it kind of crazy and a little unfair when somebody give there all to try to be with someone and try to love them but after awhile they don't love you back. but how come when most people do very little to be with someone and do them wrong but still end up with them. its not fair the one's that want to do right and doing right always be the one that get hurt in the end but the one that always mess up still get that person but don't treat them right and tat person is so blind that they don't see what's real and what's not. i wish i knew the answer to this.

Tags: heartbroken, sad, unfair

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bookunread 25, Female, California, USA - 2 entries

Aug 2016
11:17 AM PDT

Hurting

I really wish someone could just know the feeling i'm having nd tell me what to do. My heart feels like it is actually �breaking, but i could never tell him that. There's so much i want to get off my chest and tell him, but i dont. I feel like if i do say something, i'll look weak. Like i have nothing better to do than to sit around and dwell on everything. Like i am ulitmately on giant burden in his life. I also don't want to start a fight, i mean it's bad enough i feel this way, he should either. part of me even feels like even if i do tell him, that he won't change anything. I sit up at nnight trying to fall asleep wondering if he's thinking about me while he's out til 6 in the morning drinking, which he has found to be his favorite hobby apparently.
I don't even want to say the words 'Break Up' out loud... �but boy have i thought them. I really am hoping he's just doing this for the first week and will soon settle down... that's what i'm praying for atleast... But how can you put a person through so much pain and not even seem to notice.... how can you go hours without �calling or texting and just assume that i get it or i don't mind. How can a boy who means so much to you treat you likr you mean so little... how to you fix a hurting heart?

Tags: boyfriend, heartbroken, love, myself, relationship

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