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    lonelyangel  31, Male, Japan - 5 entries
31
May 2008
4:01 AM EDT
   

Who am I?

When I was young,I was a very nice and lovable girl.I always obbey my parents orders.I never talk to them back.But now,I have changed.I can see myself as an evil daughter and an evil sister.I don't know who I am anymore.I was never the good girl I used to know.Then I realized,people are really changing.I want myself back.If only I knew how to,then I would do.I hope my family still love me,because I love them even I'm changed.
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    fongyuen  50, Female, Hong Kong SAR - 19 entries
10
Apr 2008
6:24 PM AWST
   

已經有一段時間沒有再寫日誌, 雖然我知道它的功效, 但一直以來我也沒有這份毅力, 這不正是我的性格嗎 ? 做事沒有恆心, 三分鐘熱度.�

說說近況吧, 去年年底,我已經接受浸禮,正式成為教會的一份子,也開始了新的事奉崗位.剛剛過去的3月, 我和舊中學同學去了張家界鳳山市自助旅行,這是我第一次在中國的自助旅行,過程也有喜有悲.

而最近的這兩個星期, 情緒不是十分隱定, 常常會有負面思想, 樣樣事都提不起勁, 我知道這樣下去不是辨法, 但又可以怎麼辦?我己經很努力地學習改變,學習積極思想,學習與負面思想抗衡,但羅馬不是一天可以建成,我需要忍耐, 期望未來可以更好.

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Current Tags: emotion, myself, situation

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    bookunread  25, Female, California, USA - 2 entries
28
Aug 2016
12:56 AM PDT
   

Friends

I've always found it easy for myself to make friends, I guess I'm seen as a fairly sociable person. One who'd you like to go to high school football games with. Or get a bite to eat at your local cafe. Or vent to about how your ex boyfriend has a new girlfriend who you say is so much uglier than you but in retrospect is probably ten times better for him than you were.... But when it's my turn, When i need someone. Everyone vanishes. I really don't expect a lot from anyone anymore, and yet i expect too much from myself. Why do I let the wrong people in? Why am i there for everyone and anyone, damn well knowing they'll never be there in the same sense as i would? Do i chose the wrong friends to surround myself with? Or is it i rely to heavy on others in times of need? Is this how it's always going to be..? I need to learn to deal with my problems myself and make myself if no one else will... �
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Current Tags: Friends, Independence, Myself, Self-reliance

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    bookunread  25, Female, California, USA - 2 entries
28
Aug 2016
11:17 AM PDT
   

Hurting

I really wish someone could just know the feeling i'm having nd tell me what to do. My heart feels like it is actually �breaking, but i could never tell him that. There's so much i want to get off my chest and tell him, but i dont. I feel like if i do say something, i'll look weak. Like i have nothing better to do than to sit around and dwell on everything. Like i am ulitmately on giant burden in his life. I also don't want to start a fight, i mean it's bad enough i feel this way, he should either. part of me even feels like even if i do tell him, that he won't change anything. I sit up at nnight trying to fall asleep wondering if he's thinking about me while he's out til 6 in the morning drinking, which he has found to be his favorite hobby apparently.
I don't even want to say the words 'Break Up' out loud... �but boy have i thought them. I really am hoping he's just doing this for the first week and will soon settle down... that's what i'm praying for atleast... But how can you put a person through so much pain and not even seem to notice.... how can you go hours without �calling or texting and just assume that i get it or i don't mind. How can a boy who means so much to you treat you likr you mean so little... how to you fix a hurting heart?

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Current Tags: boyfriend, heartbroken, love, myself, relationship

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