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    Lost  34, Female, Washington, USA - 39,439 views
May 2007
6:56 PM EDT

omg i don't know were to start ok so i don't remember if i told you about the bad dream i was having about my fireman but it so kinda came true but ot really it just freaked me out and i huess he kinda pasted i mean i did stay there that night but i don't know it is crazy i hate this i get so stupid when it comes to him i have no idea why it so sucks
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    martytx07  32, Male, Texas, USA - 39,207 views
Feb 2014
10:18 AM CST

Just an update

Wow...I didn't know it had been so long since I last updated! Well I think a lot has happened since my last entry. I am now working at the Mesquite center. I actually like it a lot. I am the CSA...I'm not even sure what my position was during my last entry. Dang I need to start typing in this thing more. I think it's amazing to just go back and read what you wrote before. Well anyways, let's see...I am working in Mesquite as the CSA...I have been the CSA for a while now actually but just transferred to Mesquite on the 27th of January I believe. I like it a's so much nicer and the employees there are so much more well behaved....well most of them. I'm sure there's going to be a couple that are going to deviate from the proper procedure but we just need to nip it in the butt to be honest. My sister had her baby in August. She's adorable. Little fat thing. Turtle just got a promotion so I'm proud of him for that. It's gonna be good that he makes more money now that he has a daughter he will have to provide for. Well I won't say much more here because I'm starving and need to get ready so I can go great breakfast with my sister and the baby probably.
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    NoDeadenz  17, Male, New York, USA - 38,248 views
Dec 2012
5:55 AM EST

let me love you

To whom� this concerns:
�how many times have I said I am apologetic for breaking your heart? You wont let me live it down.� I will pray that god reveals to me how remedy the pain I have caused you.
�I am thankful you understand why I did what I did. It was never my intent to hurt you. Now Iam hurting too,I wonder if you think of me as tainted. My husband throws it in my face that I was raped, of course he blames me. I am forever altered, guess you kind of figured.... You just sitting next to me made me stiff up. Its not so much that Im rejecting you. I am fearful as well as cautious more so than before. Even when you hugged me prior to your exiting I know you felt how rigid I was.

Sorry� for the tears, hope you dont consider me a weakling. Thank you for always being a listening ear, although some times I dont want to hear your thoughts. I m not sure whether its god or happenstance but everytime I am on the brink of no return you show up... For the first time in a long while do I feel that I matter, that I am beautfuil also deserving of recriprocal love. Of course anyone who is willing to listen is aware of how you feel about me. You would shout it from the roof top if you havent already. LOL:)��
I have smiled when I wanted to cry, pretend,�when I wanted to� scream let me out of this hell! For so long I have been freaking miserable, not just in personal relationships but unhappy with the idea that I am stuck. Stuck in� depression, stuck in a marriage that should have never happened. Stuck with someone who is jealous of my children, stuck with my own warped thoughts. My list of things I believe Im� handcuffed to are endless.

For my kids I must make some drastic changes, I no longer want them to see me like this. Nor do am I going to be a victim of circumstances, scared but ready for change. Not refering to a man but a better relationship with self and God. John can never love me Iike I need to be loved, he does not love� himself. Cause if he did he would do better!�

I cant focus my attention on him rite now� I got to� take care of me. Iam vunerable� presently. hope you dont take advantage of this. Not to say that you ever had. just dont please!� I Love you�with agape love.
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    99tracy99  36, Female, Hong Kong SAR - 37,383 views
Apr 2020
4:43 PM HKT

Still finding solution

Sleepless is a problem, Although early wake up is a hard thing. But at least I can solve some problem now.
Bad english is not a problem. Problem is if u feel down for one guy. You will lose many guy.
Okay pop up window ask me to shut my mouth .I should back to sleep now.
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    madhousewife  64, Female, Michigan, USA - 36,069 views
Jun 2007
2:50 PM EDT

So sad...My sisters little dog passed away over the weekend. She found her outside her work place several years ago. Someone saw a man drive up, drop her off, pat her head and drive off. She just say there. My sister rescued her, took her to the vet, and gave her a wonderful home. She had lots of attention, went on lots of trips, and gave a lot of love. So many abuse animals, and others are like us and totally love them. August will mark the one year mark since my own furbaby passed, and I miss him daily.
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    coraline  51, Female, Arizona, USA - 35,681 views
Aug 2009
2:19 PM PDT


Noon: I can start updating again.� Someday I'll write about why I�had to stop for so long.

- Dirty Girl &�I will be moving into a new house this week.� Two move events, Friday-Sun, and then Monday the movers come to get the big/heavy stuff


8AM - Must finish SuperSearch systems Edison & Tesla by Friday 8/28.

9AM - WAS�Upgrade meating with Peter &�the rest of the upgrade team.� They need both NWIE�VM�images set up by Friday also.

Since 10am this morning I've been working on ITP project, ME2:

- ITP ME2 servers are moved to Columbus

- Cuervo and I�are re-ip'ing them and trying to get them to start up normally in the new network space.� Stuffer was being a total pain in the arse for a while but I�think I�have him on-board with the action items.

- must edit /etc/ldap.conf &�/etc/openldap.conf to add line:

nns_initgroups_ignoreusers root,ldap,named,avahi,haldaemon,dbus,satellite

- edit /etc/modules.conf &�remove reference to pcnet32

- edit /etc/fstab and remove 3 lines added by vmware

- After demter &�hestia are done, the rest of the boxes should come up without issue

- Forgot to change /etc/resolv.conf.� Hestia can't resolve anyone so she's not letting us in.� but that shouldn't happen with the nss line.� hmm.

- chkconfig off rhnsd &�osad?


4:40PM - every one of these servers are fucked.� none of them can get on the network to talk with their LDAP host, so none of them will let anyone log in.� What a fucking nightmare.� I�have to break into every one of these machines and fix the configurations.

All of them get host name changes

IP�addresses changed


LDAP hosts

VMWare Tools



Mail Relays

Backup Clients

This has to happen or it won't come online.� If it won't come online, you can't log in.� :)



- Mr.�T said that the firewall rules were just finished and the network is shut off on these servers until the IPs are changed etc.� No wonder we couldn't even ping gateway.� It would have been nice to be informed of that bit of trivia.

- fuckers -

- We're going to call it a day and sleep a bit if we can.

- AM�- must talk to Cole and get my access level bumped up so I�can initiate tool installs without hand holding.

�- Have to get nets turned on and test accesses.

�- Get Cuervo the info that he needs to carry this on without me, or with Stuffer.�

- Dirty Girl &�I are going to meet Nikita to give her the $$ and get the $K.

�- I'll meet Grandpa Simpson and trade my Mercedes for his Suburban for the weekend.� Dirty Girl takes Scooby to work, I�bring Suburban back here and finish Oracle server build for WAS Project, and get UID's created on Edison &�Tesla for Country Boy, Becky, and Kipper.


Calling it a night, logging out of work.� Going to start tearing down the other computers and prepping them for the move.


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    blahbee  25, Female, Canada - 34,224 views
Oct 2009
3:45 PM MDT

Waiting for hell to pass over.


I hate it when my bro is in his room. I�can't look for stuff. STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID. I need my ipod's usb cable. NOW. How am i supposed to sync my other songs in. Plus, hes in a bad mood so chances are that even IF�i knock on his door he'd tell me to fuck off.-Sad. I�know.��- Waiting for my phone bill to come. 'cause then that would mean i would have unlimited texting which is REALLY bothering me because i feel the need to text. I have so much to say. Talking on the phone is soOOOOO yesterday. Literally.-----love love love my phone. love it. SOOOOOO MUCH.-----I�know.. i'm not really typing anything "real"� I'M JUST TRYING TO WASTE TIME. cuz sooner or later he will come out of his room and go shower... cuz he stinks. then i could go in reeeeeeeeal quick and find what i'm looking for.

Now if you'll excuse me... i'm gonna go tell him that he stinks. REAL BAD.


blahbee ANNOYED

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    shadowlove  31, Female, New York, USA - 34,164 views
Jun 2009
3:10 PM EDT

I know I stopped this again... but I really need the outlet... at least I can realize that right?

I'm really tired of people and their bullshit... I don't even feel like other people sometimes >_<

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    jesssie  28, Female, Canada - 33,816 views
Mar 2008
7:27 AM EST

Last one

This is probably going to be the last time i write in this thing..everrrrr. Or i hope.

I realized a couple days ago what people are all about. You cant call people your best friends just because they are there some times. You cant call them best friends if you know they talk about you behind your back. Well, I am done with one of my "best friends" & honestly, this year couldnt have been more dramatic, thanks to her. I love hanging out with her, and I love how I have met so many more people thanks to her, but its time to really move on from that. While her telling me little life lessons can sometimes help me out, it discourages me more than anything else. No one is perfect and I'm sure we both have realized that by now; we were so fixated on perfecting this friendship for so long, but nothings perfect. Friends fight. The only problem with this friendship was that we fought over stupid things. And, I dont mean to be the girl who blames it on everyone else, but 95% of the time, the fight was not my fault. It was all her. She has been a hypocrit throughout the entire friendship. She told me a long time ago she thought I was changing when i started to smoke weed & drink. What do you know, she started drinking every weekend and eventually smoked weed as well.. Tells me i shouldnt keep things from her, but she keeps so much from me. Says I shouldnt talk about her, she talks so much about me. Tells me this and that, blah blah blah to the point where its eventually come to me that the entire friendship was a lie. It never seemed real from the beginning, and to be honest it feels like she only became friends with me because of Alex. And now that i have no ties to alex anymore, she could care less about this friggin friendship. And im happy to say that I could care less too.� I also think that while she was telling me to grow up, she was happy she knew all of my passwords to "destroy" my social life.. good one.

Thats basically it.� And i dont care what anyone has to say about that
1 comment(s) - 01:24 PM - 05/11/2008
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Current Tags: alcohol, drinking, passwords, weed

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    vjaychowdhary  39, Male, India - 33,811 views
Jan 2008
9:26 PM I

Cricket Again

India on right track against Australia
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    jmckeone  59, Male, Virginia, USA - 30,602 views
Jun 2010
5:13 AM EDT

contemplating change

There are any number of things in my life which I desire to change. Believe establishing priorities and weeding out the wood, hay and stubble is a good place to start. While TV and internet have provided numerous hours of escape from an otherwise mundane existence it has also robbed time from what might have been far better uses of my time.

So many at my age are stuck in a rut by choice. It is high time for me to make choices and sacrifices which will yield positive benefits not only to myself but to those around me. Stepping away from my own will and seeking God's will for redeeming my time is my starting point.
Tags: change
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    manavpietro  32, Male, New York, USA - 30,201 views
Oct 2018
3:37 AM IST

Why You Should Carefully Choose Corporate Gifts in UK

Your workforce and your clients are the two pillars on which your entire business stands. This also makes it necessary for you to ensure that both stay happy with you and your work ethics. From your part, you can engage numerous methods to earn their trust and loyalty. One of the best ways you can achieve this is by buying them some gifts. You can easily scan online for getting an idea about the best of corporate gifts in UK that you can share with your pillars of strength and business.

Doing it right

Choosing the gift and doing it right are both important. If you have decided to give a gift away, you have to choose a good quality gift that makes its receiver proud of you. You wouldn’t want to give your employee a really simple gift and make him think that you have no money. You definitely wouldn’t want to upset your client either by giving him a too simple and cheap gift. For a safe bet, you can choose amongst stationary items, office supplies, bags, watches, mementos, and more. Choosing a good gift which is probably branded can even tick all the right boxes for you.

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    Holly  48, Female, New York, USA - 29,502 views
Aug 2007
4:22 PM EDT

Buddy the cat is healthy now. He didn't need the operation. I am soooo relieved!
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    Jane  53, Female, New York, USA - 29,257 views
Jan 2007
5:10 AM EDT

January 22, 2007 Here’s what was transpired over the last 2 weeks in my efforts to find a house. The offer I made on a very nice house was not accepted. The lowest price they would accept was $ 10,000.00 more than I has offered them. My original offer was already stretching my budget and I just didn’t know if I wanted to pay anymore. I agonized for days over this. I decided to leave this house behind and start looking for something else. I started looking an older home on the main drag in Athens. It was a nice house but had some killer steps going upstairs!!! It was a 3 bedroom home but only 1 room was actually bedroom size, the other 2 I thought would make nice walk in closets. I toured the house twice trying to decide if this was the place for me. There was also another house for sale by owner in town. I really did want to go look at it because it was a fixer upper. My Mom finally convinced me to go look at it. Well I was pleasantly surprised to find out is was not that bad of a house. It does need updating but structurally it was very sound – no serious problems. After deciding that this house had some real potential I had to ask the Million Dollar question – how much???? The lady said that the fair market value was $ 50,000.00 and tax assessed amount was $ 42,000.00 (I’m thinking blah blah blah, how much for the house?) she said they were asking $ 35,000.00 because they realize it needs lots of work. Well, that’s all I needed to hear and decided this would be a GREAT house to fix up. I made an offer the next day and they accepted it in less than 2 hours. I should close on the house at the end of the month and then I will begin the project of remodeling it. I am very excited!!! Jane
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    lyubomirb  31, Male, Florida, USA - 27,876 views
Jun 2011
11:12 PM CST

I tried to go the whole day without any pills, and then comes the night and�I am wide awake. I am having a withdraw and paniking, resisting to take another. I want to stop and have a normal life. I want to fall asleep without any drugs. Occasions became daily consumpsion. My blood pressure is high and I am trying everything to keep it low. but I cannot stop taking all these pills. Such an unbalanced life cycle I can no longer control. I don't know whats gona happen to me, I just know I have a lot of things to do tomorrow.

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    shootingstar420  26, Female, California, USA - 27,838 views
Mar 2010
2:01 PM EDT

So, I think I'm proud of myself. My ex boyfriend always found a way to get me back wtih his lovey dovey talks, and it always worked. But this time ever since I broke up with him I havent gotten him back. No matter how nice the things he says to me are and no matter if i dont ever get a guy like him in the future im proud of myself cuz i finally walked away. He was an amazing guy, but i want better for myself. I mean as in someone who i can see everyday and with him i rarley saw him in the 6 months we were together. I been texting him even though i know i shouldn't and I have to promise myself that Ima stop. So I make myself this promise. That starting tomorrow I wont text him. Ima have my time off and when i know im over him I will text him and talk to him about how my life is great . Right? I should do that rite?
But it's gonna be hard but i gotta send my mind to it. As long as I make myself happy I will be happy. I'm still young and right now I just wana be single. I wana be able to love myself before I can love someone else with all I got. And well I just realized all this rite now at this exact moment.

It's going to be a challenge but I been thru worst and Im planning to set my mind to it. (: Im doing the right thing right? :)

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    KaityGirl214  28, Female, New York, USA - 27,727 views
Jul 2008
3:31 PM EDT

What to say? What to say? I have an idea! How crazy. I just went to Florida and it was absolutely amazing. I'm so freaking tan now. Its kick ass. Because up her in New York (near Canada land of the moose, right above us...) we've got snow like crazy. I mean down in the middle of the united states, theyre all omg weve got an inch of snow lets close school for a month! not even kidding. How did I get so off topic? no clue. check me out� peace!�

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    sexiicupcake  31, Female, Ohio, USA - 27,115 views
Nov 2007
7:14 AM EDT

um lots of stuff i need to get out!!!!! Need Advice bad!!!

heyy everyone!!! I have alot of stuff i need to get out.. I need as much advice as i can get!! Okay so lets start by saying that I love rick to death. I would do anything for him. He means the world to me!! Lets start with um how he tells me beautiful even when i dont think i am. He told me i looked beautiful with my big black eye.. I was like awww.. He's the only guy that makes me smile without even trying.Which is a great thing.. Now ima tell you that we decided to "talk" exclusively. Well because i asked him. If im the only gurl your with and your the only guy im with that why cant we just date. and he told me we could "talk" for now and that maybe in a week or too we could start dating. I mean I honestly think i am in love with this boii. Everytime im with him i get this great feeling. I mean we are GREAT together. Its just sometimes wen we aren't together we get in quite a few fites and that we get mad at each other for a while. But i just need your advice on what I should do. I mean should i be with him..or what..gimme advice
2 comment(s) - 11:01 AM - 11/30/2011
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    opinionated  28, Female, United Kingdom - 27,093 views
May 2011
6:10 PM AST

Things for working

~ 1-3 fruit smoothies (strawberry-pear)
~ Debussy, Dvorak, Mahler, Holst, and Tchaikovsky
~ A cup of coffee
~ Wall against which to hit head
~ A sudoku book for breaks
~ NO internet connection.

Aaaaaaaaaand we're off!
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    Journal4Jackson  45, Female, California, USA - 26,363 views
May 2007
5:55 AM PST

5/23/07-Woke up at normal time. Ate all meals well, two time outs (one for not getting in his carseat and one for not following directions). Highlights of the day included a trip to the nursery to look at plants (smelled them, touched and felt differences in leaves, picked out a tomato to take home and plant). Then went to the duck pond and fed ducks (apprehensive at first, but then really enjoyed it and tried to throw bread as far as he could) and then took a small walk around the duck pond. Followed by going to the park to play and have a picnic. Played with sister or by himself at first, but after lunch some other kids came and he played and tried to interact with them. He dug in sand with a sand crane, climbed ladders/stepping stones (all by himself!), slides, played with a piano and also walked half the distance of a 6 ft long balance beam all by himself!

Earnedreward stickers for following directions at the nursery and the duck pond. When it was time to leave the park he ran away from me and told me no when I called him, so he didn't get a sticker and had to go in a time out when we got home. Had his rest time, and then we freeplayed and did some painting (foam brushes with water on aquadoodle mat). Also did some compression activities and he also did some heavy work at the duck pond (pushed sister in the stroller). Had a bath, played with squishy foam and had water play/bubbles. Went on a ride with Dad after dinner and was put in a time out when he got home for not following directions and getting in his carseat. Bedtime at normal time, fell asleep within 5 minutes.
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