Well today felt like it wasn't sunday and it was one of the days during the week.� first off I had to work at seven thirty and then get off at four.� the only way I can tell that it is sunday is that my mom and lil brother are off.�
I called my boyfriend this morning around tenish and we talked for about ten minutes and then I told him I was going to try and call him on my lunch break and he said okay but he didn't answer.� Then I tried calling him when I�got off of work and he still didn't answer.� So my mom's boyfriend took me driving for a little bit and when I got back I�tried calling again but he didn't want to answer still.� So I had text him did I do something wrong that had pissed you off and he still will not respond to anything.��Whatever knowing it is our one year and four months of being together he don't want to talk to me so I guess I will just try and call him tomorrow morning on my break.��
I am so tired that I�think that I�am going to go to bed about nine tonight. I have been going to bed around ten everynight knowing that I have to get up in the morning to work. The dog slept with me last night and he loved it I hope. When my alarm went off he was licking my face like telling me I need to get the hell up.� So he was my second alarm.�
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Hey, I'm Jennilee but you can call me Jenni.Even though your not a person I'm going to talk to you like you are.But before i start telling you things here are some things you need to know about me, I'm 12� I'm almost 13 (in another year on September 25, 2010 but it's not that far maybe), I'm a girl,female,chick whatever but you get the point I'm a girl.My best friends are Kimberly, Bianka, Dawn, and Dolores.They are the best (sometimes), we get in fights,what friends don't? I've had boyfriends 2 but I'll tell you about that next time but for now this is all you need to know about ME!!!
Scincerly yours,
Jenni
Well last night after I got off work my manager took me to my boyfriends house and then I�stayed over night with him and had an awesome morning.� I just couldn't sleep last night and I had started rubbing his ***** and ***** and then we ended up doing it.� The only things is I don't want to do it anymore at his house because his roommate has said he has caught us having sex a bunch of times and I don't like the fact that he has seen us and I don't like it so I won't be doing it for awhile till we get our own house.� The only thing that sucked was I left around ten because his mom was picking him up to go do somethings so I didn't get to spend that much time with him.� But I got shoes today and some new work pants.
Well parents went out to the bar and my lil brother went to his girlfriends and then went to his friend's house for the night so I got the house to myself.....oh well except for Baily.� Well I am so stinking bored and its raining outside and its really cold that I don't even want to go outside to smoke a cig.� I hate being by myself and my boyfriend is watching a movie so he won't answer his phone and talk to me.� I have to work in the morning and don't even want to do that. �I am not tired and I am by myself and surfing this damn internet that don't have shit on it to do.� I�am twenty one years old and I don't do much like the whole partying i don't do that shit so I have a boring life.� I never thought my life would get this way but it is and I hate it.� So all I am doing is listening to music and typing and waiting for someone to get on to chat with.
There are points in my life that I just want to end it. �I hate certain people who have made it so terrible and scarey for me to live in this world.� I just thought that I wouldn't ever have to deal with this and now I am. �Ever since I moved back home I have been thinking about this a whole lot more and I don't think that I am going to keep this going too much longer.� If things don't change soon I am going to do it because all I do is work and sleep and deal with being bored all the time and can't even get up and go somewhere.� I hate being bored, I hate that I feel like this. �I never thought that this would be the way I felt.��I am missing out on so much and I can't stand it either.� No one knows how I am feeling and I keep telling this one person how I am feeling and they don't believe me and tell me just to relax and its not that damn easy.� That person is suppose to be there for me and try and talk to me and not just tell me to relax and then end the conversation.� I hate the way that I look, I hate the way I feel, I just wish that I wouldn't wake up tomorrow and maybe people would really get the way that I actually felt.� No one wants to listen to me and no one really wants to be around me and I hate it.� I�always been a loser and always will.� I�know that everything that has ever been said about me is true. I�hope I don't wake up tomorrow.�
havent written inagges!! love you aal!!xxx
today has been miserable, beaten by my mother for talking back and being stubborn, sick and losing my voice, and arguing with my loser bf about getting a job, studing for his GED and getting his tags on his car so he can come see me, which requires a birth certificate which he doesnt have, and all in all i end up staying home alone like a loser on a friday night with nothing to do. i jas i don like who i am. im that loser gurl that sits home on a saturday with nothing todo. and all i can do is wonder why? why im i here? is it because im thicker, is it because im not pretty? is it because im a bitch? is it because i moved here last year? i mean what is wrong with me? im so confused. i just hate who i am. im that bum gurl..all i can think to fix this problem is to lose weight, and to keep saving up money for a car that way i can get out of this dam house and go places and meet people and have fun. its just takin so long. and i keep on fkn up on tryin to lose weight. i just dont know where to go from here. and my bf doesnt make it any better since hes 45 min away. i just wish sometimes i could wake up as another gurl. the beautiful one, or the smart one, the talented one, the popular one, i am the unknown. and im a fkn senior and i havent been to one BIG party in my life. its just so hard for me to adjust. everywhere i have ever lived i had a group of friends and i could of grown up with them and been happy but no. i just leave and move. and try to make good friendships all over again..but its hard. ive only been here for a lil over a year and so far ive been in out of girl groups its like i dont belong anywhere. i just feel left out, isolated, lonely, the only time i really feel happy is when im with him. because he makes me feel like im special.
Damn wtf am I doing..My life is so unbelieveable no1 has a life like me no1..I lose family friends lovers and just everything..Why am O dha only one goin thru dis shyt..Im just not meant to be happy I guess..Damn bitchez tryna take my man..Bitches gon make me hit dha fan bitches juss wanna get me mad but ima be dha last bitch standin wit ya man..Hahaha juss a liddle poem of mines..
In skewl mad bored..Shyt is really blowin mines..
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