hey again
well since we have been out of school i have been babysittin, to make money to gochristmas shopping...it has been SO tiring!But this morning I got the first 3 hours off and went andgot my hair colored...it was a strawberry blonde now it is a dark red...it is really cute.. I LOVE IT... me and this one guy have been talking forever... it seems like all we ever do is talk...we are alwaytogether and for christmas he is going to florida...it will be this first time since like july that i have gone more than three dayswithout seening him. it is sadI am going to miss him...well i better get back to my babysitting...JOY
yours truly
KrazyKay
Have your parents ever gave you that lecture about how TV kills your brain cells? Yeah I know how you feel mine to! Well i think that they have nothing better to do than keep telling us that over and over and over and over again!Doesn't it get on your knerves? Mine too! Well maybe they should just get a life instead of messing with ours. I know sometimes(most of the time)they are just trying to help, but maybe they should just give it a rest. Well i g2g ttyl!!!
yours truely,
SissyB94
Welcome to Bayou Classic's World!
I have so much to tell! There are so many haters out there! Instead of saying something, I just write down my feelings to get them off of my chest!
So, sit back, relax and enjoy! You never know what will happen in the day in the life of Bayou Classic!
hey everybody,
this is my first entry on here... i dont know why i decided to get one of these things but i did so now whoever reads these will know my life or atleast what i choose to talk about. for this one i guess ill start by just telling you about myself. My name is Kendyl Mari' Jones! My birthday is Oct. 27. I have 2 sisters and no brothers but wish i had an older one. My parents are divoriced. I live with my dad. Ima total daddys girl! I am pretty much a normal gal. I live in the country and when i say that i really mean the country. I go to a very small school. I have redish hair, blue green eyes, and an athletic built body. I think im over weight, but my dad says it comes from my big getto ass and my huge boobs!!! I love to party!!! It is like a hobby for me. My friends and i are always doing something we prolly shouldnt be...lol... Im kinda like the bad child in my family. My older sister does nothing wrong. She is an angel! and my little sister is too young to get into to major trouble. Well not the same kinda trouble a teenager gets in to. Since i live in a small town everybody knows your bizznes...NOT cool!! You have to watch what you do when u are around certain people. Some know the south for our HOT country guys...yano the really ripped guys because they work in the field or on a farm, out in the hot sun with no shirt, sweating while they fix fences!! Yep well i do have to say we have some of those but not enough to share with the yankees....lol....I have had my share of guys latey. That is a long story for a different blog!! I like to think of my life as crazy but fun. I am so ready to graduate and get out of this place. well i guess im gonna go and find someting to do...hopefully it is not bad! ;) Ill post later!!
Yours Truly,
so... brought him flowers... he smiled.. blushed too. and i wondered is this what i looked like when i got flowers... i miss that feeling...
happy he was happy!
I've resisted the idea of journaling for quite awhile now. I've resisted the advice of two therapists and many self-help books, all of which have urged me to journal. However,the idea of journaling hasalways been intimidating to me. There's something so permanent about puttingmy thoughts down on paper. Laying everything out in black and white for examination. It seems so much safer,to keep the thoughts swimming through my brain. I suppose, it saves me from having toaccept the truths about my life that I'd much rather ignore.
Like everyone, there are things about myself that make me unhappy. I suppose I've been operatingby the saying "ignorance is bliss"...but it isn't. It isn't blissful, because I'm not truly ignorant of my own faults and shortcomings. They are always there...just inside my peripheral vision...nagging me...eating away at the world that I try to create for myself, within myself.
This isn't easy for me. The process of unravelingmy life to examine who I am and how I became this person. But it is a necessary process for me at this point, because I'm not happy with this person. I feeldiscontent. I'm uneasy. Uncomfortable. Unsatisfied.
I think all of these feelings are necessary to precipitate change, so instead of trying to bury them deep, deep inside of me, as I have in the past, I'm going to try to let them surface. Explore them. Follow them to their core. I imagine the process to be similar to peeling an onion; not only in the fact that there will be many layers to peel away, but that the process will likely bring tears.
I know that I have buried much sadness inside my body. I think there are many reasons for the sadness. Many of those reasons have been too painful for me to acknowledge or cope with in a healthy way.
I sometimes feel the sadness start to well up inside of me. At first the feeling is small and begins deep within my chest, but grows with a force that causes me to panic. I feel that I will get lost in the sadness if I allow it to fully surface...that I will drowned in it. So, I use all of my strength to push it back down and lock it away, not sure of where it dwells in the deep, dark crevasses ofmy body,when it lays dormant, waiting for its next opportunity to charge the gates that I have erected to protect myself. But it senses my weakness...my exhaustion...my confusion.
I don't want to spend my life fighting against the sadness, but I'm unsure of how to let it flow through me without destroying me. Can I experience the sadness in a way that will allow me to come out the other side whole? Can I not only survive the experience, but use it to gain strength?
These are questions to which I have no answers. But, I will find them...in time. This will serve as my reminder when I feel that I have made no progress. I will come back to this, my first journal entry, to retrace my steps and find my path again.
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krazykay 35, Female, Arkansas, USA - 5 entries
