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k tiah, i know this fight was among the worst we've ever gotten to. and i know everytime we get into these fights we argue and we dont talk for a couple days, we say a shitload of things out of spite and anger, and then we decide we need to be friends again, and it just happens over and over. well i said a ton of things and i really did mean them at the time, andi still think you're a bitch, but you know you are..not all the time but when you want to be, youre kickass thats for sure... but i cant stand fighting with you because it has a knot in my stomach all fucking hours that we're fighting. all day long i just think about how i lose my best friend over. im not saying i want to be best friends forever or anything ( well i do but its just not going to work out that way for us)..but i just cant fight with you any more because its exhausting and it just makes me feel like shit and i cant concentrate on anything else. not only that.. but it makes me feel worse after i read what you think about me, and think that you actually mean every word of it, when just a few days ago we were best friends and nothing could tear us apart..but now im all of these things, and to be honest i dont know why im all of these things to you! i dont understand the whore thing or anything or how i backstabbed you :( But trust me i dont try to be/do them on purpose and i wish you could understand that. and maybe you do; actually i think you understand that, but you dont care because i seem to hurt you anyways but i dont ever ever ever do it on purpose!!! but really.. it doesnt matter whether i do it intentionally or not, it just happens that i hurt you and you dont like being hurt. but the thing is!! you hurt me too! more than you think or know! but i dont backstab you like you think i do and i dont tell everyone your secrets (except for one that just lauren had to know) and maybe lauren needed to know this too, but if i honestly thought it was that big of a deal, i would have told her myself.. its nice that you could help me out a long the way but it wasnt neccessary.its not like i was keeping it a secret from her because i thgouht alex did something wrong, or that I did something bad.neither of us did, but the way that it was told to both of them, now it seems like i kept this all a secret because i was making it all up orsomething and it makes me look so bad. no one believes a word i say, although everything i told you and lauren and nany one else it was all true.i just didnt think it was big enough to make into this gigantic deal, and i guess im happy that its out in the open, but i forgot about that night to be honest. and im sure alex did too. but whatever thats not the point, the point is that i cant keep fighting with you because it gnaws at me all day! so im not saying we have to be friends, i jus want to end this little war we have going on and i dont want other friends involved. and it might not feel like a little war to you but it feels like a WAR to me! and like im not trying to accuseyou of anything i just cant fight with someone who i care about so much because it makes me feel brutal and seriously, if you care as much as i do you might know what im talking about. like i care about you so much and i hate whenyou areupset and it makes me upset to see you sad.. it actually does. and when you give me advice and help me out with the problems im having, it helps a lot and im really happyyou havebeen with me for breaking up with alex and breaking up with ben and all the other stuff in between and im sorry for bringing up both of them. you have beena huge help but to be honest i think i just needyou a lot more thanyou needs me anymore, and its not fair toyou to have to be there for me all the time and i cant be there for you because you either wont let me or dont want me to be..or i just cant do anything about you. becauseyoudont need anyone because you're all independent and im dependent, becausei cant figure things out on my own because i need other peoples opinions on things and its just my nature and i swear im not making up an excuse but i fit my astrological sign completely and libras just are like that! I NEED opinions because im indescisive and we were doing so well and now things have fallen apart, and niether one of us are motivated to put things back together yet ANOTHER time. I dont know where we stand, and a part of me doesnt even want to find out, but the other part of me and does. i dont know what to do about anything and if this was with any other person i would be asking for help to what to do. but i dont have any other person to talk about this with.. not someone who understands what we do. so what now?

I love this time of year! This year I was actually able to buy a tree and some ornaments. Last year I was too poor! As of Friday I will be free for a couple of weeks and I'm really looking forward to relaxing and soaking up the christmas atmosphere.

There are so many things I love about christmas: the snow (if we get any), snuggling up by the fire, sharing a good cup of coffee, tea, hot chocolate with a friend or family member, giving gifts and seeing people enjoy them, being with people you don't get to see on a regualr basis....

I want to hear what other peoples favourote things are about christmas and what your favourite christmas stories are.

Merry Christmas!

Purpletulip

Hi again, well this is the third time i've written today, well like it's says i do need a place to call home. No, i haven't been kicked out ofmy house, i just need...life.

Why can't i be as happy as Sly Cooper And Carmelita Fox? Why is it so hard to find happiness? Why can't i make friends? I'm different from most ppl, i don't judge nor do i act a certain way to impress ppl. I want happiness, but i can't find it.

Why isn't life so simple?

Why can't happiness be found throught heart?

Why is it difficult to say i'm happier without the sun?

Why is it difficult to be a human being without someone breathing down your neck?

But my only REAL friends wanna say something too.

Eliza- Hey all out there, Angel is one of those ppl whocan't take the easy way out of things. She gets caught in the moment. And she's one of Sly Cooper's BIGGEST FANS!!!!!

Bailey- True that! She's written some stories on Fanfiction.net that you should read. Her name on that is BlackLadyofTheNite, well on that she is 11, but in the real world, she's only 9...Angel ain't no Angel.

Carla- Yeah! But!!! She can change her personality ALOT! One minutes she's happy; next upset, next; angry! grrrrrrrr with the stupid mood swings!

and...

Kexi, a.k.a Lilly- W/e Angel, just hang in there...tough times call for sleepovers! This weekend is SLEEPOVER FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!

First,

real quick, my tooth! It has been a long two weeks, in and out of the dentist office, on anitbiotics, still my tooth bothered me and hurt and got pretty damn bad, so finally I got a root canal today! I was so afraid of the root canal but so far so good, I think it probably helped but we'll see. I also got my permenant crown and so I don't have to go back the 21st!

Now, CN,,, I guess I don't really know where we stand. I have been SO extremely mean to him at times! I don't know why. I know my tooth hurting has been a Bitchyness factor but still the poor guy doesn't deserve it! My moods have been so up and down. Sometimes I think I need to get back on the A-D but I really don't want to! AGH! I don't know what to think anymore! I am going crazy with the boys, they are so naughty most days and I lose my patience with them and my anger gets the best of me. I think sometimes they deserve a good spanking but not all the yelling and me losing my temper and smacking them. I think Cory sees how I have been reacting and doesn't want to commit to "THIS!" and surely doesn't want to bring a baby into this mess! (Believe it or not, I have actually been thinking of a baby-- girl!---) and he hasn't been lovey to me or told me I am beautiful and doesn't talk to me hardly at all. I'm not sure what is going on with us. I do think I am starting to get stressed thinking about selling my house and moving and possibly giving up my job to be with someone who doesn't (right now) at like he even loves me! HUM!

I am the most prettiest girl in the world. I am very Unique. And Powerful. My true love is Austin Banton. I love butterflies, angels, and spider pig...the thing i think is the best is, my best friends, Trista, Psycho Kitty (AngelOfDarkness), and my family. If you read this, thank you.

, AngelEyes

Firstly, can I just say a very big Thank You to everybody that left a comment or email message for me. I almost keeled over when I saw how many I had. For one horrible moment I thought, while under the Influence, I had struck up some kind of deal with guido trying to make it big, in my bid for fame and success! lol. Alas, that was not the case, considering I stumbled on guido's page by pure accident, I was just lucky enough to be on the right page at the right time! lol and boy! am I glad I did!. There will be a rather large glass of either Brandy and Lemonade or Bacardi and Diet Coke raised in the air towards you all on Christmas morning lol.

Decided to miss the usual Christmas Tipple last year until way after dinner! Hmmmm. What a silly move! lol. I was too stuffed and exhausted to lift the glass let alone attempt to compete in the usual Christmas day extremely competitive games,quizzes and sing-a-longs! For there only being 3 of us, It's amazing how much noise we can muster up! lol Bet the neighbours loved the peace last year! Well this year, It will be back to normal! lol. Dinner will be on the table for no later than 2pm. I will just make sure my glass comes with me when I have my usual bath in the morning along with choccies and bath goodies. Awww. I think I just got a twinge of excitement.

For some reason, It hasn't felt very Christmassy this year. I don't know If anyone else has noticed this? or Is It maybe just me? What I do know though, Is how absolutely freezing It Is!. I took ages to heat up last night. I was wrapped up In 4 layers aswell and still couldn't get warm. Can't believe that earlier today, I agreed to have a test run for our Christmas Dinner..... lol bought a huge stuffed Pork Roast, Roast Tatties, Carrots and yorkshire puddings! Tasted amazing on Sunday!! lol Now, can you all tell we love our food here? lol.

I have the cheek to grumble about being a lot heavier than usual! Well, Hmmm, I wonder why! lol. Och, If the truth be known, This Is the one time of year that everyone should be having big hot meals and be all cosied up with the fire on doing something they love! Ooeer! within reason of course! lol Must go just now and refill my cup of tea and check the oven. Back Soon. xx