�
bloody shelth
shelth thy bloody blade one courps lay still warm humble dager? may i be your shelth and thine blood your pollish? or tis i not worthy of thy yet? come come take me home to my mother let the darkness of thine heart cloud all who visit these to warm corpses. � � lonely red wolf on the edge asking for jane to clam her an put aside her fear of life. � � �my sumon � come, stay not long from my side. steel not your warth back, share all with me. your love, pain, joy and hatered. keep me from alls mothers grasp by sharing your life with me. grabbing the hand of angel will keep it earth bound for ever more. � � lonely red wolf asking for her own wingged being to eather clam her form her pain or have someone to share it with. � �toy of not � here thy pain here your love kisses for death hugs of life you toss me back and forth am i your yo-yo� your joy am i nothing more then your toy? send me home cast me away into deaths arms colder than day but you never saw me that way smolder home in your light while i retreat into the night. � � lonely red wolf asking the master if she turely needs to be.� for she often asks to take home to be with her mother and taken away form her fear of life.
i am sitting here with my BFF!!!! we are having fun watching movies and just plain out talking about nothing.. to fill you all in about the last few weeks of my life or the last forever.. cuz i hasvnt written in a while.. josh and i broke up because of a big misunderstanding... we arre trying to work things out so i guess you could say we are back together.. his birthday was on the 20th and we went out to dinner..it was fun over all, just alot of catching up, considering i never get to see him cuz he is always away at school... well i will write another page of my boring life at a later date.. to those of you who know me and those of you who dont.. i hope i can bring a smile to your face and inspire you to beleive in yourself... just listen to you HEART is all i can say at the moment... well LATA!!:)
Friday night:� WELL, long story short,,, my dad called and asked if "she" could come to the wedding and after a long explaination and some fighting and yelling, I held my ground with NO she should NOT come because it would make too many people feel uncomfortable.� So my dad said he would not come to the wedding.� He then called and left me several messages making excuses for "her" and that she has had a hard life and I don't understand!� Well, what I do understand is, I've had a "hard life" but that doesn't mean I need to "be with" my� brother in law and then expect everyone to be a okay with it all!!�� I tried to explain to him that I know she is a good person but that I am not okay with her doing what she is doing and not okay with her coming to the wedding.
Another review by me. Remember this is my opinion based on my experience with the specific State Park. Each person's experience will be different.
State park #4 is on the chopping block. It is time to tell you about a park that we give a very low rating when it comes to the people who work there. Palmetto State Park. This park is convenient because it is close by. It is an absolutely gorgeous drive in to the park off the highway. You should stop at the small pull over area and look out into the fields below. This park is between Luling and Gonzales. (these two cities have some history, especially Gonzales so check it out if you can.)
The park itself is divided up into, basically 3 points. The first is the office area where you check in. Try not to spend too much time in there or you won't want to stay and see the amazing trails. After you check in, you will drive a small way up and on the left will be the first part of the park. Here you can enjoy the Oxbow lake. It is great for fishing and you can rent pedal boats at the office (these are at a very good price.) I can't recall the exact amount. Renting it for the day is the best deal though. You can also get canoes, I think. You can tube here as well but I would watch for snakes. You can view wildlife, including snakes, on the trails that go through the woods. It is beautiful at this park. The palmettos are dwarf like palms and they grow thick in the marshy waters. On the trails you will pass over wooden bridges and lots of marshy areas. The birds are every where. Please watch for snakes. I am not kidding at this park. I have never gone to Palmetto State Park without seeing at least 3 snakes each day. They don't usually bother you but just be careful not to step on them or anything. You see them more around the ponds, spring, and Oxbow than on the trails. If you want to do any activity other than fishing this side of the park is where you should do it. Now, to get to the otherside you will need to go back the way you came and then take a left and go across the bridge. Your next park entrance will be on your left. This side is where the best trails are. I have already told you about them. There is an area that you can walk down to the water and cross over from this side of the park to the other. This is usually where they take tubes out at and small boats. Sometimes the crossing will be covered with water. At this time they close the trail gate. If you have a boat in or something don't bring it this way to get it out of the water if the gate is closed. The people at this park will jump all over you. They would prefer you fight the rapids, get the boat to the side of the huge cliff you are camping on top of and drag your boat up the side. If you fall in just remember you are swimming at your own risk. While we are on that subject, PLEASE watch your children if you are camping at one of the sites on the bluff. These are very steep, straight down falls in most cases. Your child could be over the side in the blink of an eye. I would camp closer to the bathrooms or on the other side in the more primative sites if I had very small children. Both sides do have playgrounds.
We never stay overnight at this park except our first visit ever. It was a huge ordeal. This parks office closes early so be sure to be there no later than 3:30pm. I would not risk any later check in. Remember, unless you bring your own wood, you will need to purchase some from the park store. Most parks prohibit the gathering of firewood. You may want to get enough ice to last until they open back up too because in the summer it can be hot and ice will melt quickly. This park office is closed more than it is open. It is closed for about 15 hours plus a day. You may arrive to find them already closed even though it is 15-20 minutes before office closing time. Once you get all that taken care of and you�pick out a site, don't get too relaxed because although you were not allowed to reserve a specific site, the guy coming in at 10:30 pm reserved your specific site. You argue but he insists.�You are cooking on that pit and the tents are all setup, have been for hours. It doesn't matter because he wants your site, he reserved it specifically. My husband talks to the park host. He says no, the guy can't reserve a specific site. We are already there. We can stay where we are at. Husband comes back, the guy gets angry and drives over to the park hosts home. They talk for a while. Then we can hear laughter. Then more talking and finally the guy drives back. A few minutes later the park host comes and asks us to move, the guy reserved this site. (sites can not be reserved at any state park. you can only reserve a site�in a specified camping area. Example: Campsites 1-20 are water only. You pay for water only so you get one of those sites but you can not say which one. That part is on a first come first serve basis.)�My husband argues and then we end up packing up and about 11:30pm we finally have everything done and the park host wants to know if we would like another site that also has water, since that is what we paid for. We ask why he didn't just put the guy over there since we were already setup. The answer was, He reserved that site! So, we left the park and now we only go there for the day since we have a state park pass and we do not spend a dime there but we spend plenty at all the other parks.
We ended up at Coleto Creek Reservoir. That is not a state park so I will tell you about it another time.
Final words, go to Palmetto State Park, enjoy its beauty, hike the trails, fish the San Marcos River, and picnic under the live oaks with their dangling spanish moss. Have a great time but avoid the people who run this park. They are not so friendly and don't play well with others.
Another thing, if it rains, even if it is not flooded the park closes its gates and you can't get in. It has happened twice to us.
This is my opinion. Go see the park and create your own.
Thurs.
Been a busy week.� Today's Jay birthday! It was good to talk to him this morning.
Cory�left Easter Sunday and will be gone 14 or more days, depending on travel (plane vs. drive!)
why is it that whenever something good happens in your life something has to�go bad?WELL IT HAPPENED TO ME AGAIN!!! when soemthing in ur life goes horribly long u want to tell someone well here it goes. this boy jake ive been tellin u bout, Jake, well we were becoming really really good friends but then missy came in tellin him i like him and ruined it all im never forgiving her im never forgiving him and i need all the help i can get to get over it....
This Diary Entry will be finished now... worked on later i will make this public� comment if youd like
BUT IF U TELL ANYONE OF THIS THAT I KNO OF BC U GO TO MY SCHOOL YOULL BE HACKED!!!
Paranoid, Anxious, and Annoyed...
Why is this happening to me?� Could it be my little monthly friend knocking on the door?� Ahhhhh...these feelings seem to run my life sometimes
Sometimes I wish I could just go be alone with myself to work it all out...But, when that chance will come, I'll feel normal again.� It's moments like these, when your forced to put on your� happy face, while inside you feel like bursting into tears....
Mood Swings Suck!��
Life Crisis Management
昨天家里来了个18 岁的洋姐姐，敦敦很雀跃，为了配合他的表现欲望，我给他出了个难题。
我的题目是， 敦敦已经50岁了，是某公司的小经理，年龄大了，面临被淘汰的危险，老婆有工作但收入不高，敦妈已经80多岁了，身患重病，在安老院惨度余生，敦敦有两个不争气的儿子，30 多岁也没有工作，还没结婚，最糟的是他们的女朋友还都意外怀孕了，眼下儿子和儿子的女友们都来找他要钱活命。
敦敦被这难题难住了，皱着眉头想了半天，问我，我现在手头有没有点积蓄，我说有点但不多。
敦敦说：
1）我先投资，挣到钱后买或租一个大一点的房子，把老妈妈接回家照顾。
2）我会让我的儿子们回家，给他们三天的生活必需品包括牙刷，提供睡袋，然后我鼓励他们出去找工作，比如在酒店当个侍应生之类的，争取自食其力。
3）我会让我儿子的女友们把孩子生下来，我会和老伴帮他们先照顾着两个小孙子。
敦敦说这些的时候。表情无奈，不时地流露出绝望的眼神。
我说情形又有改变，两个小‘孙子’长到两岁多时被星探发现，开始拍奶粉广告，家里又突然又有收入了。月入五千。敦敦说，我会用两千元照顾小‘孙子’，其余的三千元留给孩子，做他们将来的教育费用。
我说情形又有变化，你彩奖票中了大奖，五千万。你将如何处理呢？
敦敦眼睛一亮，似乎看到了希望。我会将小孙子还给儿子们自己带，并提供每个孙子一年的生活费。一年以后的生活就由他们自力更生。我不会给他们太多的钱，防止他们永远依靠我。
因为我的事业在走下坡路，在被淘汰之前我会辞职，用这些奖金来办厂，搞时尚运动鞋的研发，让年轻人体验多款的时尚运动鞋。我的商标叫Felix. 我的品牌会跟阿迪达斯和耐克竞争市场。我要让我的老母亲穿上我设计的新款运动鞋。我还会改造牛仔裤，发明牛仔运动装。
最令我和洋姐姐惊奇的是，在这个‘危机管理’游戏中，敦敦十分地投入，在我叫停时，他还没能马上从饱经生活苦乐洗礼的50岁老父的角色里拔出来。敦敦兴奋地说，妈妈，我似乎刚刚度过了整个的一生。从敦敦的危机处理风格，可见他遗传了父亲的善良和母亲的坚毅，我给他95分。
实际上生活就是一场游戏，我们每天都在做各种我们认为合理的选择，在必要时还要应付危机。最难的是在低潮时不放弃，坚持到新希望的来临。
I still don't know how to express... well, anything really.
I wish I knew how people do that - how they open up about things.
I have to start letting some of this stuff out of my head.� I have to find a way to connect to the people I love so they aren't strangers anymore.
I hate being so alone.� I mean, yes, I have G - and my relationship with him is wonderful.. but he's at work so much of the time; I'm on my own almost constantly - and I don't cope.� I'm not coping.� Not even slightly.� I am so sodding lonely.� And yet I compound it by isolating myself further, because it's all I know how to do.� I don't know how to reach out to pepole.� Maybe I should know, but I don't.� I can't cope with the simplest levels of communication.� I do what I can, but it's really not enough by any stretch.
And I'm so tired of it.� So damn very tired.
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