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Dreamer 30, Female, Australia - 16 entries

09

Oct 2008
7:06 AM WST

the catch up

Me and�Eddy* got back together� on May and i promised him i would meet him on december. Things had been going really GOOD between us. He is the most adorable loving man. But i am a�not 4 him�and i never seem to be content with anything good in my life. I always have to push the envelope. I have made him prove over and over and over again that he loves me.

His love for me is not quetionable... not alot of NORMAL ATTRACTIVE HARDWORKING LOYAL LOVING�men would talk to a girl on the phone for 3 years without actually meeting them.

It's been a while.....it seems like i come running to this site when things between me and eddy are @ a down hill. I finally told Eddy the truth(well sort of) about me not meting him...he did not take it so well.

This time i won't shed @ tear (in pubic). it's like i am slowly dying inside(and i derserve it!!!) .

Now i have to go to my sister's wedding thats half way across the world. It will be good to get away......but one can't always run from there problems. It's wierd some part of me actually feels glad that i have told him. I had started to feel really guilty

I hate myself for what i am doing to Eddy but thank god it's almost over. I hope i have the strengh to make the right choice. He is a good man he deserves so much better than me

charliemay 28, Female, United Kingdom - 16 entries

12

May 2007
11:36 PM EET

he totally ignored me 2day.he didnt say a word 2 me.at alland i dont know why.i keep thinking how well he goes with all these other girls and not me.and i keep on thinking about me being with otheer boys.i love him and i dont want to break up with him so why am i having these thoughts.i just dont know.

chanduliar 42, Female, Texas, USA - 16 entries

25

Apr 2007
1:25 AM CST

I have left this site and went to live journal. Please visit me there. Thansk everyone. 47
www.chanduliar.livejournal.com

questioningeverything 35, Female, California, USA - 16 entries

12

Apr 2007
11:48 AM PST

What is terrorism?

Terrorism is not something we normally think about defining. It is thrown at us in a certain context. A context which we just accept. But what if we are asked to question it? No one approves of terrorism. Terrorism is defined by the people on the other side, say the US Administration. We are currently waging "A War on Terror." Terror defined by us. Defined and in so many ways created by the government. I just heard a quote which made me really think. It went something like this: Why should terrorism be defined by 9/11?

Terrorism has been happening all over the world for so long, but when 9/11 came it meant something, not because the US is superior but because we are the most powerful nation. The reality is that it has been happening around the world on much greater levels than it was performed in the US.

Now let's look at what dictionary.com defined terrorism as...

1.	the use of violence and threats to intimidate or coerce, esp. for political purposes.

2.	the state of fear and submission produced by terrorism or terrorization.

3.	a terroristic method of governing or of resisting a government.

I want to examine the second definition. "The state of fear and submission produced by terrorism or terrorization." What does that mean? I was always told not to use the word in the definition.

Look at the third definition: "a terroristic method of governing or of resisting a government." So that is to say that a government cannot be partake in terrorism. What about a dictatorship or an authoritarian regime--or say a democratic one? If the government of any state is able to define terrorism as something that is against them, then it would seem we have a problem. This is a problem because if you put the power into the hand of one person and they cannot be questioned in some way or another it becomes oppression. Oppression is never responded to well, and it shouldn't be.

In the US media we are told day after day they there are terrorists in Iraq and throughout the Middle East. It has become a scare tactic for this administration to get the country to follow. I am aware that there are bad people out there, but we are not living in a black and white world. We are living in a vibrant, colorful world where the definition of right and wrong is indefinable by just one nation or one group of people. It is a world where context is everything. Right now, we are occupying Iraq. Many will disagree and even call me Anti-American for saying such a thing. Anyway, the thing is that the so-called terrorists who are blowing up things and killing people are not necessarily completely different than then our soldiers. I know that I am unaware of what it is like to be living in an occupied state. I am unaware of why these people are fighting against us. I do not know how I would react if someone walked into my house and started trying to control me. Now I know comparing an American solider to what our government has defined as a terrorist is beyond what I should be doing. But they are each fighting for a cause which they think is right (and in some cases the Iraqis may have a better idea of what they are fighting for).

I want to mention something about the military for just a second. There is this idea throughout the United States that we are supposed to support the troops regardless of how we feel about war. Now let me say that I admire what the military in an ideal way is meant to be: A group of people who are willing to put their lives on the line for you or me. That is amazing thing, but I am not a fan of war. I don't think it is necessary 99.9% of the time. We learn as children that we are not supposed to fight, we are supposed to learn to use our words to fix our problems, yet militaries are still a needed thing for most countries. Works shouldn't have to fail. I am not only critiquing the United States but the world. I respect the military for what they are willing to give up, but I think that it is silly for them to do so. There is so much they can do with their lives and bringing honor to killing is just not the way to go. It is unacceptable to kill, unless an individual is about to kill you and there is no other way to injure them in a nicer way which would allow you to get away. I am one of those people.

I was not able to stay for whole documentary because I had leave for work but what I saw of Arabs and Terrorism brought up this question. It was really interesting and I hope to get a hold of a copy to watch the rest of it. This is such a difficult to discuss this topic because it is one that is not questioned for the most part. It is controversial and a touchy subject for so many. But that is what makes it so important. Not every Arab is a terrorist and Americans can be terrorists.

andheartsme 31, Female, Hawaii, USA - 16 entries

23

Jun 2007
9:10 AM HAST

stupid party. shoyld have been hotdogs and not burgers. wah wah wha.

daredevil8 30, Male, Illinois, USA - 16 entries

10

Dec 2007
12:54 PM CDT

nah, I as said by a wise man, I am what I am, and I do what I do, thats
what I stand what abotu u?

dejack 64, Female, Michigan, USA - 16 entries

25

Apr 2012
10:03 PM

Greatness

For me their are different kinds of greatness, so for me it depends on what you think greatness is, one people might think greatness is learning to read where as some else might think it isn't.

kgirl 35, Female, Michigan, USA - 15 entries

12

Jan 2007
12:51 PM EST

i realized that I'm more than halfway to being 20. i'm not sure what would really change in life, but it feels like a big step. any 20-somethings out there who can tell me what the big 2-0 is like? hey, does anyone know a place in nyc or flushing where you can get dongdongju? i was in korea for a few days this fall, and it was my favorite thing to drink.

Tags: kgirl

1 comment(s) - 04:08 PM - 06/19/2007

MrsOakley 35, Female, Nevada, USA - 15 entries

10

Mar 2010
8:18 AM CST

My Fiancee and I Have Finally Picked The Date For Our Wedding...July 10th, 2010...We'll Being Having It In His Home Town...For One His Family Is Larger And Mine Are Willing To Drive To Be Apart Of The Celebration...Two Decorah Is Absolutely Beautiful For A Wedding...

3 comment(s) - 11:09 AM - 03/20/2010

meagan 43, Female, Canada - 15 entries

31

Dec 2008
4:32 AM EST

Happy New Year!

I've got TONS of goals for 2009!� My main fitness goal is to lose approximately 40 pounds of fat, re-gain some of the muscle I lost while pregnant, and compete in IDFA's Toronto Classic on July 11 with my best body yet!� I've lost about 35 pounds since I had my baby at the end of August without really trying (a mixture of not having time to eat all day because I'm so busy with him, breastfeeding, and not hanging out at restaurants so much), I've been teaching my dance and exercise classes, walking a lot (it's too hard to get on streetcars with a big stroller), and getting down to the gym a bit, but thus far�my fitness efforts have�been pretty sporadic and lazy in my mind... which is fine - I don't mind that I gave myself a few months to re-adjust my new life as a mom�without throwing myself right back into super- workout-girl-mode as soon as I got home from the hospital.� But, now It think it's time to get crazy!!!� I've set a very reasonable goal of competing in July, so I have 7 months to get ripped!� I'm so excited about getting more serious about my training (and less excited about super clean eating).� Now I just have to decide if I'm going to compete in fitness or figure... Getting� a fitness routine together now that I've been out of the scene for so long may be challenging, but I might try!� I'll keep you posted!� HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Tags: fitness competitions new year workout dance

2 comment(s) - 10:10 PM - 01/12/2009

lmm27295 41, Female, Nevada, USA - 15 entries

29

Jan 2007
8:03 AM EDT

I am very upset about last night, but I am not going to raise my voice w/ you or get loud and upset and I would appreciate it you can do the same in this conversation. I am going to try to express how I feel to you in the nicest way that I know how and w/o trying to purposely upset you. Please listen to what I have to say just like I listen to you and let you speak your peace. First of all, the other night you expressed to me how when you come to me you want me to be understanding, caring, etc. I did not get that respect from you at all last night, I feel like you set all the rules that I am suppose to follow when you have issues but when it is me w/ the problem, all rules are broken. And no matter what point I try to make to you, I feel like you always try to twist it instead of really listen and trying to understand why I think the way I do. Communication, the things that are said, I understand you have your ways of thinking and that they are not like mine, but it is how you handle it and the words that are said, I am tired of the hurtful things, it is one thing to talk to me about things that frustrate you about me and its another to say the things that were said last night, you have to learn how to control your mouth b/c it is pushing me away from you. It is making me not want to be close to you. You don’t understand the fact of when you say things like you do, they are not forgotten, and I carry them with me You have top realize that we are not alike. We are different in so many ways. We think different, handle things differently, see things differently etc. We have to except that about each other. You don’t always act the way I want you to or say what I want to hear and the same goes with me. Or you say things sometimes that you think are funny but you really have a meaning behind it is where we again, have to set boundaries. There are boundaries that have to be set and have to be respected and not crossed. I have to know that if I call up Chandra and trash talk you to her that I have crossed a boundary and I have to expect that you are going to be upset, so I don’t cross that boundary. Just like w/ me, if you purposely say things to hurt me, then u have crossed a boundary and I am going to upset with you. Trying to express a concern w/ one another is going to have to occur from time to time but just down right be mean to one another is going to drive us apart. With the wedding, I am tired of being threatened. This is how I feel, point blank, if it is said again, that the wedding is called off, then that’s it, I will follow through w/ it and we will not get married, I not going through a roller coaster with this wedding. This event is suppose to be a fun and special time and it is not turning out to be like that. This is something that is very important to me and my family and I have a lot of people that is putting a lot into this for me. We have 5 months left and I don’t want to have to look back at this time with you and think of how miserable it was for me. I don’t want to keep having to harp on the wedding issue. Either it is going to get better or it won’t and if it don’t then we need to call it off b/c we have people that really care about is and this event and they are putting a lot of $ into this. If you don’t want to get married then PLEASE tell me now and I will stop it all! If we don’t think we can live together, than let’s call this off, I am going to tell you right now, I cannot stand a messy house. If this is going to continue to be an issue than something is going to have to change. I don’t ask you to clean toilets, or scrub, the shower or dust. All I ask of you is to pick up after yourself or do a load of clothes or take out the trash or jump in and help if we have guest coming or put your coat in the closet. I want a neat and clean home and if this is a problem for you then like I said, this will never work. I cannot do it all by myself. I have to work to. I cannot constantly pick up behind you. So if that is what you want then I will do it but I will be a stay at home girl. You talk about how you love that I am girly, well this is part of that package. I grew up in a messy, unorganized home 80% of my life there and I WILL NOT have my home looking like that! Trust, Trust is very important, especially considering what is getting ready to happen with us. This issue has really put a damper on that with me. I am not going to lie to you, I did search for it once I realized that there was some on the computer. I understand that you have needs. U are a man and that is understandable. What frustrates me is how you hide things, u may not realize this but it kills your creditability, it makes me question things that you tell me and I hate that. I hate that I have to pull the truth out of you. PLEASE just be up front with me and don’t hide it. It just makes it 10 times worse. When you are in the wrong, just be honest and we can work through it easier. Do you want me to hide stuff from you? It makes me think 10 times more of you if you don’t hide stuff. When I don’t feel like I can trust you, it makes me not want to be close to you. I don’t care what it is, big or small, don’t lie to me, tell me stuff before I have to find about it. I want to be able to find comfort in you and be able to let my hair down with you and I want to feel like I can tell you everything and I want to feel like if I fall or make a mistake, you will be there. I want to be that person for you. I want has to build a bond with you, not a wall. I just want you to know that I love you. I want you to truly love me, to the pt that there is nothing that we would not do for one another and I am not talking about small stuff like you always fixing my drink or me always having to get up and get something for you. I am talking about stuff that really matters. We can be a great couple if we try hard. We have got to stop giving up. I do it to. And we have got to take responsibility for our actions b/c if we deny what we do, then we will never change it and I am not talking about telling one another a problem just to cause a problem to make the other one feel bad. But we have to start admitting what our fought are so we can make them better and help each other with that instead of criticizing them for it. Its funny cause in a lot of ways our situation reminds me of Sonny and Carly as stupid as it sounds. I think we need to figure out a way to help with these problems. I am willing to do anything. I have been unhappy and buy what u said, u have too. #1. I think we need to set a goal for reading the book that I bought. I think we need to read 5 to 10 pgs a week. And we can read the same pgs, prob not together b/c we will not see that much of each other, but we can talk about what we read. This will also help to know that we are both reading them and not just saying that we are. #2. I think that we need to set aside 1 nite a week to go do something together, ex. Bowling, or we can trade off, one time is something you like then next time something I like, We should fit this in every week even if something else has to go. It is important that we start getting closer and trying to build a stronger bond. #3. On Sundays, we can both get a piece of paper and right down one good thing about that week or a praise for the other person and one disturbing thing so that we can learn from it. Do you have any ideas? This stuff may seem stupid but I am trying really hard to keep us from tearing apart.

1 comment(s) - 11:46 PM - 03/02/2007

gunsnroses 30, Female, Greece - 15 entries

19

Nov 2006
6:38 AM EDT

i miss you...i miss you so bad.. :(

Brunette Mess 35, Female, Texas, USA - 15 entries

06

Mar 2010
4:23 PM EST

Sweet Summertime

Life has been way too crazy and stressful lately. So at the end of April, I will be unemployed. I tried the whole 'working full-time AND going to graduate school' thing, but it ended up being too much. I feel that I am missing out on the most important schooling of my life by working at a job I don't particularly enjoy.

Ok, on to the main reason for this blog. I want to make some changes this summer. Here is the list of things I want to accomplish this summer:

1.) Work out - I've tried, but during the semester I have zero time to exercise. I really only gained a few pounds, but I want to feel healthier. My plan is to begin running, as far as I can. I'll just build from there. I hope to get up to at least 10 miles.

2.) Be more social - Currently, the last thing I want to do on the weekends is to go out and be social. Usually I just want to catch up on my sleep...and then study.� I want to go out on weekdays and meet my friends at fun places in Dallas.

3.) Join a sports team - Since I won't have much going on this summer, I want to play in an intramural league. Great way to meet people and to stay active.

4.) Spend more time with my puppy - I adopted a 2 year old black lab back in October. He is one active lab and he is always wanting to play. I feel guilty because I am usually way to busy or too tired to play. I want to spend more quality time with him.

5.) Summer school - Since I have to take summer school, I want to make the best of it. I want to actually get a feel for UTA. I want to venture around campus and see what there is to see. Currently I go to class and leave. Since I will have an advanced degree from this school, I really want to know campus.

6.) Grow out my hair - This may sound lame, but I want to spend this summer relaxing and waiting for my hair to grow. I want it looooooooong!

7.) Practice my photography - I just bought a Canon Rebel and I really excited to play with it. Hopefully I can spend this summer taking lots of pictures.

8.) RELAX - Haven't had much time to relax and figure out what's important to me. Laying out by the pool, leisure walks with my puppy, sipping' ice tea on my porch, etc. Can't wait for all of this stress to be lifting off my shoulders.

Well, that's quite a list, but I think everything is pretty do-able. I'm ready for you Summer! Bring it!

mOmmy2Be 33, Female, Texas, USA - 15 entries

03

Mar 2007
10:39 PM CDT

A True Best Friend

I don't think you know her,

She's not very popular.

She's the most beautiful person I know,

And she always makes me feel great.

She knows how to brighten my day,

Even if it's the darkest one yet.

She always has my back,

No matter what.

She's a True Best Friend.

She has a heart of gold.

She has hair of dark brown.

She's my angel.

She's my soon-to-be childs' God Mother.

She's the only one who understands me 24/7.

We've been through thick and thin,

Ups and downs,

Boys and more boys,

And even stupid girls.

We've been through hard times,

And we've been through good times.

We enjoy each other's company.

No matter what time of day.

She's the first person I talk to in the morning.

And the last person I talk to when I go to sleep.

She'a a True Best Friend.

She has her fault's,

But, then again, who in this world doesn't?

She sees every tear.

She catches the next,

And she stops the third.

She is there and already knows what's going on before anyone else.

She's the type of person that you can give your life to,

And not expect her to hide it,

or give it back.

She's always here for me,

Whenever I need her.

She drops everything for me,

And she'll use her last drop of gas to come get me,

And not expect nothing in return.

She's A True Best Friend.

Her name is Elisha Lynn and she's the most amazing person I know. Girl, you're my angel and I love you so, so much.

Much Love from me and the baby...

Best Friends Forever and Always

May 2006 - 'til the day we die!

flowerlilliesofthegarden 45, Female, California, USA - 15 entries

15

Aug 2009
3:52 PM PDT

A Trip to the Mall

I had a really awesome day! I felt great all day, even though my leg was hurting. I went to the mall with my friend's Caitie and Maricia. I had a gift certificate for $50 and it was awesome. I bought some stuff for Caitie and Maricia and it made me feel really good. I really enjoyed buying stuff for my friends. I don't get to do that often and it was awesome! I couldn't really find anything I liked anyway. We went a few different places in the mall and then we went to Carl's Jr and hung out. I got a sandwich and split it with my friend and we shared the fries among the 3 of us. Caitie got a shake and Maricia and I got soda.
�

Tags: Good Day

SallysSilentMurders 32, Female, Louisiana, USA - 15 entries

05

Apr 2009
7:30 AM EDT

Life isn't fair it's how the world works. I didn't know what I'd do when everyone I cared for had abandoned me in my time of need. But I did realize that if they did that when I needed them the most they were never truly there for me in the first place. So friends I have became ones I had. The ones I care for became those who I no longer care for at all. They tossed me aside when I was fighting for myself inside. I was tearing myself up and they didn't care. So I'm glad they left they did no good for me.

3 comment(s) - 06:54 AM - 05/24/2009

MariPanda 28, Female, Nevada, USA - 15 entries

08

Feb 2007
1:13 PM PDT

I've been practicing my singing. I'm getting better and better. (So to speak) Practice does make 'perfect'. Not like my singing is perfect, but it's pretty good. At least that's what I've been told ;)
Yes!!! No school today and tomorrow; staff development or something. Yay! 3 more days of bliss. Hopefully, undisturbed.

Rei 34, Female, Philippines - 15 entries

18

May 2007
2:21 AM WST

el nuevo dia le jour nouveau a new day

manindra 47, Male, India - 15 entries

01

Aug 2007
8:13 AM I

public

Tags: public

2 comment(s) - 05:45 PM - 11/05/2007

every1luvsme 31, Female, Ohio, USA - 15 entries

06

Apr 2007
1:08 PM EDT

Micky is in Florida and I miss like crazy... my sister is having boy troubles, she misses the old dayz like hell!

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