“Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin!" - ANONYMOUS
I chose this quote because for so many of us, it's true. We are afraid of dieing, it's just human nature to be afraid of our lives ending. However, I agree that it's more important to be afraid that your life will never begin. Some may say that their lives have begun when they get married, to that I'd say, yeah it could, but I feel that life life begins when you aren't afraid to live. By that I mean when you take chances, you take risks, you aren't afraid of living life to the fullest, you aren't afraid of loving someone so much. You aren't afraid of just being you to the max. Life is full of obstacles but how you decide to deal with them is how your life will turn out. Blessed be, be safe and live! Nate
Here we go, it's Wednesday and it's going to be HOT.
Mark, the pc guy is coming today. Hope the new(used)pc turns out to be a good buy cause we're stuck with it now. Why do I let the kids talk me into things?
Since school started last week I'm trying to adjust to my new daytime schedule, haven't found my niche (I wish this journal had a sp.check, had to lookup that one!)�just yet but I will. I have to be careful not to start thinking that I need to fill the�empty time�gaps, they will fill in naturally, they always do. I have to ignor the voice that says, "You should be doing more, you should - this, you should - that". I'd like�to have a project though - we'll see.
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I went camping again at the weekend, a beautiful site, high on a hillside in wales, overlooking the Wye valley. In the evenings we watched the sun go down over the wooded hills opposite, while we sat around an open fire, drinking wine and talking. As it grew darker we lay back looking at the stars and talking about how the solar system came about and our scale in the universe.
Somehow living like this, and its only ever for� a few days or a week at the most leaves me feeling melancholy and unsettled, somehow feeling sad instead of happy. Most of the time I do feel relaxed and happy, enjoying where I am and what I'm doing, but there is another part of me that is somehow gently grieving, and this is the part that is strongest when I return to my day to day life.
I'm going to see Ikuru next week and I wonder how it will affect me. Its premise about living the simple life has made me wonder if that is what I have lost. It is a simple life when I'm camping, cooking food, eating, sleeping, talking, being in a small community of people you like and trust. This is not how I'm living my day to day life.
I read something by Suzuki about learning Zen Buddhism; he said there was no point in trying to add zazen into an already busy life. Adding another thing to do which becomes a pressure is the opposite of what you should be doing - life is too busy as it is without adding more. Rather do less, practicing once a week is enough to begin with.
I like the idea of living a more simple life I just don't know how to live it.
10:15 - I wanted to start working on the RHEL5 gold image today.� VIC in New York didn't give me a 5 option until I moved over to Mage.� Mage has 3.02 on it, Seer only 3.01.� 5 Wasn't an option on 3.01.
- Kipper needs me to look @ gargoyle.
� - A few weeks ago Kipper called saying that he couldn't get processes restarted after a change window on cyclops & gargoyle.� It can't spawn enough processes he says.
2008-08-26-09:46:05.742-07:00I----- 0x38AD51C2 webseald ERROR wiv pthread WsWorker.cpp 495 0xb5c06080 DPWIV0450E Could not create new thread (11) 2008-08-26-09:46:05.814-07:00I----- 0x38AD50A4 webseald WARNING wiv general IVServer.cpp 978 0xb5c06080 DPWIV0164W Could not start background process
Explanation: WebSEAL failed to create an additional thread. This may be due to running out of operating system resources or exceeding process limits. Action: Check memory and thread limits for the process, and available memory. The error number can be looked up in /usr/include/sys/errno.h for more details on the problem.
- I raised the nproc limit in /etc/security/limits.conf a few weeks ago, set the hard limit up from 1000 to 3000.� Today I set the soft limit up from 400 to 1000.� No difference.� PMR is open with IBM.
0 - Got the OK to boot clover and basil last night.� It turned into a complete clusterfuck that was my fault entirely.
� - A few weeks back, Slick deployed these VMs and did the identity change and tool install etc.� He's not a UNIX person, but he knows his way around well enough.� After he finished, he asked me to double-check what he'd done and I completely blew him off because I was working on other things.
- The servers rebooted, but came up complaining about VMWare Tools not matching the running kernel.� I think Slick compiled VMWare tools before shutting down, not after restarting.� So when he did the compile, he was still on the old kernel.
- I booted them both back to their old kernel and got networking up, then loaded in a compiler and tried to find the kernel headers or source code on RHN.� It wasn't available and I have no idea why.� Perhaps the kernel was retracted, I don't know.� At any rate, I finally got the source code from kernel.org and got it through our firewalls and into a system where I could move it around.
- Right in the middle of this, a storm blew through the desert and knocked down my business Internet connection but spared my home connect even though they're both in the same house.� grrrr.
- Booted the systems to the new kernel, compiled the tools, unloaded the source & compilers and turned them back over to Becky to get OV up and running.
Ended up taking 1.5 hours instead of 20 minutes.
tada!
Here I am. At the beginning of a new adventure, Journalling. Who would have thought it? For me this presents a challenge to my usual way of thinking and a change in the way I live my life. An introspective look at my reality with the view to charting my path for the future. My�objectives for this�matter�are
Next up personal Swot analysis.
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