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    lilvixen  35, Female, USA - 10 entries
02
Oct 2006
1:02 PM EDT
   

hey today was a good day for me. i had fun at skool and found out that alot of boys like me. well i g2g byex for now
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    jleigh09  38, Female, United Kingdom - 35 entries
02
Oct 2006
4:58 PM WEDT
   

i feel so pissed of i was going to be staying at stevens but now i'm not he has decided to go to work so i wont see him now prbably till next week sometime god i feel so angry i was looking forward to tonight so much and spending tomorrow with him. i hate it when steven lets me down u know when we make plans and he changes them. i just feel let down. it good i'm not seeing him this week now coz we would probabky end up arguing and i dont want to. anyway never mind life goes on and i will see him next week.
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    SterlynSilverRose  37, Female, Texas, USA - 3 entries
01
Oct 2006
10:46 PM EDT
   

What did I do today? I actually sat down and did absoultely jack squat. I laid in bed and watched about 15 episodes of slayers. I finished the first part of the series and stuff ...Yeah fun right? Hell it got my room mate and suite mates to leave me alone. Also I watched the ending episode to Ouran High Host Club. 26 episodes and this one was the most action packed. I ate it up like most girls my age would though...It was a sad ep but happy at the same time. Tamaki came back to everyone and the host club will still be there. Not only that but, apparently Kyouya's dad and Tamaki's dad both want Haruhi to marry their sons. That impressed me. Maybe the fact that it impressed me is because although I might not be as cute as Haruhi I have some of her personality. But, of course since that ended I had to find something else to watch right? Well, I have decided that I am going to be very patient and wait till like Wednesday or Thursday for D.Gray-Man and Death Note Episodes to come out. I can't wait since I have been reading D. Gray-Man. Oni-con is Oct 20th so this is 18 days and counting. I am looking forward to it and I think that it's going to be a whole lot of fun. I just want to have some fun and see my friends since things at my recent college are not going to well in the friend department. I already feel myself distancing quite a far way away from everyone here. Not that it matters or people notice much. I DID come to study. I didn't come to make friends after all. It kinda sucks but, I am getting my gamer hands back and slowly I am able to feel my spirits lifted due to manga, anime and games. Yeah, I know that it's pathetic that I cling to those things, but that is really what defines me as who I am. I guess you could say that it makes we really happy to where I don't need to bank on the companion ship of others to give me that. Why rely on people when they can't even be there for you on the most important or mundane occasions? I would much rather just know that I am working for myself and to better myself as a whole. But, in the interaction department I guess I will just never get any better. Oh well, not a big deal right? Right. That is what I will tell myself. Even though I do want a boyfriend sometime I don't need one now. A wise man once told me not to look for anything lasting in college because guys just want the girls that will 'put out' and I think he hit the nail on the head. Welp enough for my random thoughts. I'm going to log onto Pirch and see if Vulspeth is on. He owes me rp.
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    paxangel  33, Female, Texas, USA - 103 entries
01
Oct 2006
10:29 PM EDT
   

I LOVE THIS SONG. LAST RESORT Cut my life into pieces, this is my last resort Suffocation, no breathing Don't give a f*ck if I cut my arm bleeding This is my last resort Cut my life into pieces, I've reached my last resort Suffocation, no breathing Don't give a f*ck if I cut my arm bleeding Do you even care if I die bleeding? Would it be wrong? Would it be right? If I took my life tonight? Chances are that I might Mudilation out of sight, and I'm contimplating suicide Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine Losing my sight, losing my mind Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine I never realized I was spread too thin Till it was too late and I was empty within Hungry, feeding on my chaos and living in sin Downward spiral, where do I begin? It all started when I lost my mother No love for myself and no love for another Searching to find a love upon a higher level Finding nothing but questions and devils Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine Losing my sight, losing my mind Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine Nothing's alright, nothing is fine I'm running and I'm crying I'm crying, I'm crying I'm crying, I'm crying I ... can't ... go ... on ... living ... this ... way Cut my life into pieces, this is my last resort Suffocation, no breathing Don't give a f*ck if I cut my arm bleeding Would it be wrong? Would it be right? If I took my life tonight? Chances are that I might Mudilation out of sight, and I'm contimplating suicide Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine Losing my sight, losing my mind Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine Nothing's alright, nothing is fine I'm running and I'm crying I ... CAN'T ... GO ... ON ... LIVING ... THIS ... WAY Can't go on ... living this way Nothing's alright!
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    paxangel  33, Female, Texas, USA - 103 entries
01
Oct 2006
10:12 PM EDT
   

.:i'll alwayz Be Beside you:. .:until The very End:. .:whiping all your TEARZ away:. .:Being your BEST friend:. .:i'll smile when you smile:. .:and feel all THE pain you do:. .:and if you CRY a single TEAR:. .:i promise i'll CRY TOO:. I LOVE YOU
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    paxangel  33, Female, Texas, USA - 103 entries
01
Oct 2006
9:48 PM EDT
   

though i can't be with you tonight you know my heart is by your side
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    SavanaSSantos  33, Female, Texas, USA - 30 entries
02
Oct 2006
9:03 AM EDT
   

SDCONDHAND SERENADE LYRICS Maybe Lyrics Didn't you want to hear the sound of all the places we could go Do you fear the expressions on the faces we don't know It's a cold hard road when you wake up and I don't think that I Have the strength to let you go Maybe it's just me, Couldn't you believe that everything I said and did, wasn't just deceiving And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face makes me wish that I was never brought into this place There goes my ring It might as well have been shattered and I'm here to sing about the things that mattered about the things that made us feel alive for oh so long about the things that kept you on my side when I was wrong Maybe it's just me, Couldn't you believe that everything I said and did, wasn't just deceiving And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face makes me wish that I was never brought into this place And someday, I promise I'll be gone And someday, I might even sing this song To you, I might even sing this song, to you and I was crying alone tonight and I was wasting all of my life just thinking of you So just come back we'll make it better So Just come back I'll make it better than it ever was x2 Maybe it's just me, Couldn't you believe that everything I said and did, wasn't just deceiving And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face makes me wish that I was never brought into this place Maybe it's just me, Couldn't you believe that everything I said and did, wasn't just deceiving And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face makes me wish that I was never brought into this place ( I want it all, Don't leave right now) (I'll give you everything) I hate this song (thats the title) sleep with your tongue tied. i know that you're tired, but i just want to know where you want to go. i may be sad, but i'm not weak. this situation is is __ your puppy eyes never lie. your tears come from inside. until some day i'll be waiting for an answer and i guess that yesterday's not good enough for you. you know that i hate this song. you know that i hate this song because it was written for you. drown your fears with me. i'm feeling real sorry. your glossy eyes don't need the sadness they have seen. but you're way too deep to swim back up again. but somehow i can't find the moment you said goodbye. this is becoming a problem. i'm hurting. it's unfair. but somehow your words, the way that i heard, are hauting me. you're under my skin. you're breaking in. the tasteless fights that filled our nights are starting to cave in. you're under my skin. you're breaking in. and if "some day" is what it takes to prove, i have nothing else to lose. until "some day" i'll be waiting for an answer. The very last song I wish my life was this song. 'Cause songs, they never die. I could write for years and years and never have to cry. I'd show you how I feel without saying a word. I could wrap up both our hearts. I know it sounds absurd. And I saw the tears on your face. I shot you down. And I slammed the door but couldn't make a sound. So please stay sweet, my dear. Don't hate me now. I can't tell how this last song ends. The way that I feel tonight... so down, so down. I pray I can swim just so I won't drown. And the waves that crash over me, I'm gasping for air. Take my hand so I can breathe as I write this last song down. And I saw the tears on your face. I shot you down. And I slammed the door but couldn't make a sound. So please stay sweet, my dear. Don't hate me now. I can't tell how this last song ends. The broken glass, your moistened skin. Was everything, was everything. And your broken voice was quivering. You're everything, you're everything. Scream at me, make it the best I ever heard. Laugh out loud, I know it sounds absurd. Scream at me, make it the best I ever heard. You're everything, you're everything. Heartbeat's slowing, pains are growing. Does she love you? That's worth knowing. Heartbeat's slowing, pains are growing. Does she love you? That's worth knowing. Yeah. Vunerable Share with me the blankets that you're wrapped in, because it's cold outside (cold outside, it's cold outside). Share with me the secrets that you kept in because it's cold inside (cold inside, it's cold inside). And your slowly shaking finger tips show that you're scared like me. So, let's pretend we're alone. And I know you may be scared and I know we're unprepared, but I don't care. Tell me, tell me, what makes you think that you are invincible? I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure. Please don't tell me that I'm the only one that's vulnerable. Impossible. I was born to tell you I love you. Isn't that a song already? I get a B in originality. And it's true, I cant go on without you, your smile makes me see clearer. If you could only see in the mirror what I see. And your slowly shaking finger tips show that you're scared like me. So, let's pretend we're alone. And I know you may be scared and I know we're unprepared, but I don't care. Tell me, tell me, what makes you think that you are invincible? I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure. Please don't tell me that I'm the only one that's vulnerable. Impossible. Slow down, girl, you're not going anywhere. Just wait around and see. Maybe I'm much more, you never know what lies ahead. I promise I can be anyone, I can be anything. Just because you were hurt doesn't mean you shouldn't bleed. I can be anyone, anything. I promise I can be what you need. Tell me, tell me, what makes you think that you are invincible? I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure. Please don't tell me that I'm the only one that's vulnerable. Impossible.
1 comment(s) - 12:24 PM - 10/02/2006
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    dawn  48, Female, Texas, USA - 9 entries
01
Oct 2006
6:04 AM CST
   

OMG i am aving the worst life. my son is driving me to the point f tears and no one is being very understanding the house is a wrek and al i do is go to work and school and take care of my kid i am sick to death of my life when is it my tuyrn
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    sparklerainbow91  34, Female, California, USA - 3 entries
01
Oct 2006
11:30 AM PST
   

Nick, What to do? today was like so bad! last night i found nicks myspace. on it he talks about lexi, lexi, lexi! i have such bad luck in love. i would have thought that i would have gotten a bf before Ashley ever did. boy was i wrong! she got one at the football game. i was like so happy for her and all, but at the same time, i was so sad that i nick has a gf. who would have known that nick is with lexi? there is like definitely no chance in heaven or hell that he will even notice me, let alone get with me. so here i am looking for a bf, but no such luck. i have never been one of those pretty, popular, skinny girls. i have been taller than most of the guys i have ever met let alone seen. i have been rejected so many times i am just use to it now. it is a part of my daily schedule. none of the guys i have ever liked has never liked me back. how sad it that! i finally get over this guy who i thought was so amazing in every way, to find out that the guy i got over him had a gf. i like every guy who is taken or doesn't like me back. i mean i am not ugly, i am pretty and really smart. i can be annoying some times when i get hyper, but who doesn't get annoying? i was standing by my friends and nick walked by. he looked at me and i looked at him. we locked eyes until he walked away. it was like no one else was there except for the two of us. it was so nice. he is in football. he is like so cute and tall. finally some one taller than me. i feel wrong for liking some one i know i can have no future with though. he has been with lexi for 10 months. i don't want to break them up, but i thought we had a moment at the game. i think that he is more into her than she is into him. that is just my opinion though. he talks about her on his myspace a lot. she doesn't say one thing about him on hers. someone also told me that she only got with him because of his personality and not because of his looks. i love his looks and his personality. by reading his myspace, i can tell he is a good guy. when Noel wanted to walk away from Ashley, nick was telling him, go back and wait for her. go back and wait. i feel like we had something just for that split moment. it was so nice. i wish i had a chance. i really do. i have never had good luck in love. i cant even name one person that has had a crush on me. that is really sad. i have never been hit on, only as a joke or something. i mean Robert tells me that i am not fat, ugly, and that there is nothing wrong with me when i say there is. i mean, whydon't guys ask me out? do i give off some vibe of being a bitch or something. i don't mean to. i don't smile all the time, but who does? i just want to be with a guy that loves me as much as i love him. all my friends have had bfs, except for me. even some of the ugly and fat ones. but here is me pretty and not fat, and still single. my friends try to make me feel better by saying stuff like he wasn't the one or you still have a chance. that is what i love about Robert, he tells me the truth straight up, even if it hurts. i feel so lucky to have him as a friend. he makes me feel better no matter what happens. he is always there for me and always will be. anyways back to the nick subject. i think i should just give up on love. why not? no one will ever like me. i might as well become gay or something. i really don't like girls, so i think that is going to be a problem. lol. i mean i really don't have a chance. he isn't in any of my classes, i don't see him at school, and the only time i see him is at the games, where his gf is. i mean that is the first time i have seen him at school. well i really didn't see him at school anyways. i remember seeing him in the yearbook and thinking, wow he is like the only hot guy in this yearbook. oh well my dreams. at least i get to see him in my dreams. i cant even tell if i am flirting or not. or even if someone is flirting with me. so many times i have been tricked by guys. i thought that yeah they totally like me because of whatever they did. but no, my senses failed me again. i am just like a hopeless girl looking for love in all the wrong places. i feel as if there is like no hope at all. my friends keep me happy with hope. well until tomorrow, ill let you know how my day goes.
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    tearsofmoon  36, Female, Florida, USA - 2 entries
01
Oct 2006
1:57 PM EST
   

My first entry is about life and what i need out of it i am 17 and i have no clue of anything that is going on i have a b/f but he has cheated on me i guess you really wouldnt call it cheating he only made out with her but i dont know its a fact over is he still doing it and or is he going to do it again.
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