It has been just over three years since I have written on this. I thought all was going well in my marriage and then he walked back in. I heard his voice and called him...all was platonic; all was
innocent. He was just a friend from the past. He came to my house, we talked and I sent him on his way...I was married and happy. The fertility issues still at the forefront but we had plans. One
by one those plans began to deplete. We lost our bar, my husband couldn't find a job we had no money for the procedures for the bundle of joy that would fulfill my dream of being a mom. I began
calling him often then in October I made a bold move. I met my past fling at his work and gave him the journals I had kept on him all those years back (9 years to be exact). He read part of them
and asked me out for a drink. Being married to an very jealous husband I didn't want to risk being seen so we went to his place...when� he kissed me I knew there was no turning back...he is still
in my life and says he cares for me and will wait for me. My husband is picking up on the vibe that something is off and I am pulling away from him but I feel bad because he has not really done
anything wrong. I know this is all a bit confusing and the story will begin to unveil itself as these enteries add up. Right now it is a classic love story. I love him and it is my fault that I
can't have him...