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    keonyama96  31, Female, Kansas, USA - 191 entries
27
May 2010
1:11 PM EDT
   

New fone :)
1 comment(s) - 11:28 PM - 05/29/2010
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    GirlWithAPen  28, Female, Indiana, USA - 28 entries
27
May 2010
9:19 AM EDT
   

Mmkay. So I have seriously been considering attending Olney Friends School when I'm a sophomore (that gives me a two summers and a school year). Why not? I know I wouldn't get religious persecution for my Quakerism because the school is run by Quakers... Sure, I wouldn't really have internet access for much other than school work, but I could live with contacting my parents via snail mail. From what I read on the site ( olneyfriends.org ), the attitude displayed by the students is a lot more serious than you find at most regular schools, and at mine, there is only a handful of "serious" students. Very comfortable, communal environment, AMAZING music program, some student theater, vegetarian meal options (:D), and a town that's just a bike ride away (only on weekends though...). Those were a few of the pros, here come the cons- Expensive, no internet in dorms (like I said), all students are required to do farm work (I'm used to manual labor, just not daily), and I would have to do my own laundry (:P). I'm still thinking it over. Dad says that next fall break we'll visit for a tou
1 comment(s) - 11:29 PM - 05/29/2010
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    vampiricakatt  29, Female, Minnesota, USA - 102 entries
26
May 2010
5:54 AM EDT
   

Rockets

missed school yesterday but we are lanching the ROCKETS TODAY YAY! IM SO HAPPY!
3 comment(s) - 07:20 PM - 06/02/2010
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    Jane Williams  60, Female, Louisiana, USA - 8 entries
26
May 2010
4:47 PM CDT
   

Missing him.
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    whoami?  40, Female, Nebraska, USA - 60 entries
26
May 2010
2:21 AM CST
   

Indifference is my disease


This quote seems to answer a big question for me. There really is none that I can truly love or truly hate because I feel so indifferent. The indifference has to come from the depression, but where the depression comes from I don't know. My mom, sister, and aunt all have had or have depression but does that mean it is inevitable that I have it? Can't I rise above this with God's help? I know I have before so why is it back? I also know that there are certain things I have to do to fight it and I haven't been doing those things, I've just been the helpless victim. I need to get outdoors more, soak up the sunshine, exercise, eat healthy, and spend time in the Word. Yeah, haven't been doing any of these things...for the most part.

Back to the original point here, being indifferent. I don't want to be this way. I want to care. I want to love someone with all my heart and truly care whether or not they are in my life. I want to allow someone to truly love me. But at the same time, I am waiting for the one that will love me this way and that I will love in return this way, because we are meant to be together, and I guess he just hasn't come along. There have been others, and they've all been great guys in their own ways, but I had to turn them away because they didn't love the Lord the way I do, and that makes a big difference. Am I just waiting for a silly, unrealistic dream to come true? Or is it possible? Is it worth the wait? Is it possible to have love the way I see it in my head, godly love, unconditional love? Do I need to back off this idea and just settle? I want perfection and I absolutely know I won't find it, but am I letting good ones pass me by because I'm waiting for perfection? Am I letting them pass me by because I'm indifferent?
3 comment(s) - 12:15 AM - 05/31/2010
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    GirlWithAPen  28, Female, Indiana, USA - 28 entries
26
May 2010
3:11 PM EDT
   

Mmkay. So I have seriously been considering attending Olney Friends School when I'm a sophomore (that gives me a two summers and a school year). Why not? I know I wouldn't get religious persecution for my Quakerism because the school is run by Quakers... Sure, I wouldn't really have internet access for much other than school work, but I could live with contacting my parents via snail mail. From what I read on the site ( olneyfriends.org ), the attitude displayed by the students is a lot more serious than you find at most regular schools, and at mine, there is only a handful of "serious" students. Very comfortable, communal environment, AMAZING music program, some student theater, vegetarian meal options (:D), and a town that's just a bike ride away (only on weekends though...). Those were a few of the pros, here come the cons- Expensive, no internet in dorms (like I said), all students are required to do farm work (I'm used to manual labor, just not daily), and I would have to do my own laundry (:P). I'm still thinking it over. Dad says that next fall break we'll visit for a tour of the campus and a bit more information.
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    whoami?  40, Female, Nebraska, USA - 60 entries
25
May 2010
7:07 AM CST
   

Are my expectations unreasonable?

What do I expect of others? Well that depends if they claim to be christian or not. If they claim to be christian, I expect their life to reflect that claim. I expect them to abstain from premarital sex and foreplay, getting drunk, cursing, stealing, lying, and cheating. I expect them to value church or at least some sort of christian fellowship, and for them to be spending time in the Word alone with God. I expect them to be responsible and dependable, selfless and humble. I expect them to be loving and kind to others, and non materialistic. At the same time I expect them to stumble. I expect them to get mad sometimes, to choose the selfish route, to get frustrated, to get sad. I expect them to be human and for them to be transparent enough to admit they aren't perfect. Is this all too much of an expectation? Is it legalistic? Because without a doubt I struggle with legalism in my own life and have these expectations for myself but shouldn't we try to live up to God's standard? I know we won't get there and that's what grace is for, but again, shouldn't we try? Shouldn't a disciple of Christ desire to model Christ and please God? Paul tells us not to use grace as an excuse to do wrong, but that we are saved by grace so we can't boast in our good works. So I have stated what I expect of christians, myself included, is this unreasonable?

What do I expect of those who do not claim to be christian? I think I still expect respect from them. I still expect them to be responsible and dependable, but for what reason I don't really know. I expect them to live unapologetically, if they choose to live counter to the ways of christianity, I expect them to do it with pride, because if they feel guilt...there's a reason. When people live unapologetically, I respect that, and I would like to live more like that. I love living my life for the Lord. I love serving Him, I love sharing the hope He offers with people and being there for others, but yet I find myself living in constant apology because there are some people who aren't pleased with my decision to live like this. I feel like if I were different, if I had never chosen to give my life to God, obviously my life would look incredibly different.� But some people would be much happier with me.

I wonder about what that life would look like and if I'm being honest, there are things about it I would like, but would I feel empty, would I always being searching for the purpose I feel now? Or would I be obliviously content? I have to believe that becase we were all created by God, for God, we are always searching for Him, and all He brings to our lives, most importantly salvation, hope, grace, freedom, and purpose. How do people live without these things? I have these things, yet I live like I have none of them. Where is my hope, where is my freedom, where is my joy? And if I know the route to get these things, what's it like not having them and not knowing how to get them?

Anyways, that's enough for now.
2 comment(s) - 09:04 PM - 06/01/2010
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    HopeInGod19  32, Female, Michigan, USA - 5 entries
24
May 2010
7:26 AM EDT
   

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. 13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. I have told more people of my strong discerning and have found some to think I'm crazy. Someone w
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    keonyama96  31, Female, Kansas, USA - 191 entries
23
May 2010
7:11 PM EDT
   

Whoeva asked how 2 define love tell me da answer wen u find out
1 comment(s) - 10:16 AM - 05/24/2010
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    HopeInGod19  32, Female, Michigan, USA - 5 entries
23
May 2010
4:07 PM EDT
   

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. 13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. I have told more people of my strong discerning and have found some to think I'm crazy. Someone whom I strongly respect couldn't swallow the fact that I may become an IHM Sister. Frankly, I consider them to overly and scarily zealous, and am concerned for them. They think that everything has to be ornate and I disagree. They complained that a crucifix only in their Chapel is against God and I think that is fine. They also couldn't believe I'm even considering this life. I feel like they're only going to hurt me.
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