Wow ok so this guy asked me out right but i said no because i dont want a bf right now. But he keeps trying to get me to rethink it but ok i told him that no matter who asked me out i would say no at the moment. He still refuses to believe that and the fact that his best friend which is my ex comes up and puts his arm around me and says oh so totally loud um thats a lie. Guys are retarded arnt they! i swear they no nothing. no means no and gosh they just need to get a clue.!!!!And im talking to my ex's bestfriend which he is older than me but totally hot so its all good. And he said he likes me and i like him but i dont think we would ever go out. just cuz yeah it might be a little awkward for one and for two he might be a little too old....but whatever i dont expect anything to happen between us so why worry about it right.
What a day yesterday was!! Something was wrong with the sewer at work and we couldn't use the toilets or wash dishes. Talk about being grateful when they announced we could use the toilets. Whew!!! I knew I'd never make it home.lol
I think I need to go back on meds. I really hit a dark wall this past weekends. It is confusing. One person says write a "gratitude journal" always being up, and another says to get it all out. Say in a journal what you don't want to say out loud. I have no trouble saying how wonderful this is, and what a great job that was. It is telling someone they are lazy good for nothings, or other negatives that you don't want to hurt feelings during a fit of anger. Once out of your mouth ,you can't always take it back or have do-overs.
Originaly I started doing "journaling" when a counselor advised I write down everything and how I felt from the momment they said' Your Dad is dead". There was very little Gratitude to write about. Getting it out helped a lot. Of course now I tend to ramble, and I admit 90% is probly negative. I say what I can't say out loud, put the feeling out there, read them , and try to find solutions.
I have many things to be grateful for, and thank my higher power every day.
敦敦上学时的心情
敦敦每天上学要路过一条很有意境的小路。柳树姐姐们站姿婀娜，在晨风中殷勤地向人们行大礼。虽然含羞的桃花姑娘并没有主动地向人们献媚，但匆忙的路人们还都抵不住她们的诱惑，忍不住偷偷地瞟她们一眼。还是风流倜傥的狗哥们懂得行性感，他们在嫩绿的草毯上洒脱地摇摆着尾巴，骄傲的显示他们才是地球上真正的'好男儿'。
每天这三分钟的路程里，我们娘俩轻快的脚步声总伴着敦敦对生活的一番感慨：'妈妈，我很开心，因为我有朋友，朋友改变了我的想法，改变了我的感觉，改变了我的心情。妈妈，感谢您，您教我如何感受和体验生活而不仅仅是活着。妈妈，我觉得我们家是全世界最快乐的家庭！'我每每都被孩子这由衷的幸福感所触动。
说实在的，谁也说不清全世界最幸福的家庭究竟是个咋个幸福法。与书里写的，电影里看的，报纸上登的相比，孩子们内心里感受到的才是真格的。难怪托尔斯泰说，幸福的家庭都是一样的。其实天底下哪个辛勤劳作的父亲，哪个含辛茹苦的母亲都是巴不得自己的孩子能天天怀着如此幸福的心情去上学。
母亲们在对孩子幸福感的培育中扮演着重要的角色。甭管孩子的先天智力如何，从这孩子看妈妈的眼神里，你能读到，他对这个世界的感受，他对自己肯定与否，他对周围人有多大的信任，他有没有同情心，他对大自然是不是'感冒'，他对未来有没有所期待。孩子认知能力的发育决定了孩子长大后能多大的限度地了解自身，结交知己，摆脱困境，游戏人生。学习上的佳绩只是孩子良好情商的一个'副产品'。甭管妈妈是不是'成功人士'，从妈妈看孩子的眼神里，你能读到，孩子父母亲本身的弱点和性格缺陷和她们对孩子现实和不现实的期许和奢望， 因为母亲对自己的孩子从父辈得来的血脉传承太了解了。
人非草木，孰能无情，这'情'来源于母亲在孩子小时候对孩子的情感灌溉。这'情'决定了孩子日后的生命质量。造化，造化，如果孩子大部分的身心为前世所'造'的话，他心中可变的'灵性'部分则在于后天由母亲用心来'化'得。因为母子的心是相通的。看到这里，各位父亲不必不平衡，因为母亲能不能有心情和精力在孩子身上用心，就全养仗您的造化了。
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