view member journals

 

Search All Journals

    
You searched for: Country : USA
    satinlady  65, Female, Florida, USA - 46 entries
09
Apr 2000
8:45 PM CST
   

A poem to recite to myself for Alcohol

God grant me the serinty to except the things that I can not change� and the courage to except� the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference in the time that I need it the most(Alcohol) That� I can over come this power to� not do it...............

Add Comment:

Current Tags:

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



    taioca  45, Female, Maryland, USA - 5 entries
01
Jan 1985
5:48 AM EDT
   

Introduction to: It can happen to me, why not you ?


���� People always seem very skeptical when they know I’m in dental school. I noticed their disbelieve immediately after I tell them what I study. I even told my husband to keep a close look on people's� face when I tell them I’m a dental student, just so he can report to me later. At first , my husband was sure it was my imagination, but he came to realize that peoples expressions were a little off, not to say "shocked".


���� I always considered myself a hardworking person. �I was never an "A" student or a "B” student. I was more the "C" or "D" student. Not because I did not work hard. It was more the opposite to be sincere. I worked so hard; that it was hard to believe I was a C - D student. I came in terms with myself�“I was just not the brightest" I did not see anything wrong with that. Until, when people would call me names like “slow", "stupid" or " God I give up you won't get it". That is when i started to realize that maybe I was a little slower than pretty much everyone in my class.

���� Growing up in Brazil, I had many other things to worry about than school. I grow up with my�dad and grandmother. We were not a rich family; I matter fact my dad struggled to make the ends meet. My mother is American and my dad is Brazilian. I always wondered�what was my mom�thinking when left me in Brazil at the age of three. Now� that I am living here in the United States, I understand perfectly why she did what she did. My mom always want us to have what she never had a " family".

���� My mother left my sister, my brother and myself�the care of our grandmother. My brother was from her first marriage. Now my sister and I were from her second relationship� ... I really don't think I can call that marriage, since she was never married to my father.�

���� My mom left us at a very young age. I remember her vaguely when I was little. I fell like a lot of the emotional struggles I have today were a result of her leaving us. I never blamed her for what she had done. I think it was very brave of her to live all her kids in a search to better their lives. With that being said, I think if wasn't for her living us; I would never be able to get an education here in the states or ever have meet the love of my life. That is why I’m a true�believer that�there is always a reason for why God does what he does.

�� So, here I start the journey of a lifetime. Coming out a poor city from the north of Brazil and ���not know any English at all; At the age of seventeen, I left all I ever had, friends and family to come and live with a women that I� barely knew. I had to learn a new language; new culture, and� a new life.�

Add Comment:

Current Tags: Introduction

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



    behind_blue_eyes921  49, Female, Virginia, USA - 412 entries
08
Dec 2013
3:41 PM CST
   

Paul Walker

Last week we lost one of the most amazing persons I've known through out the years. The death of Paul Walker just shocked me to no end and I still am having a hard time believing he is gone. I wish I could wake up and it all be a dream to me, but I know in reality it is true and he is gone. It is sad and heartbreaking for me.

I am a very big fan of Paul Walker. I have followed him through the years, all his movies and interviews, pictures and anything that revolved around him, I was reading or watching it.

We are close in age and I think that is what is making his death hard for me to accept. People say "oh he was 40 yrs old" Ok he may have been but to me that is not that old and he certainly did not look that old. People say "oh he died doing what he loved" I am sure he loved fast cars, but I don't think anyone would want to die that way. I just don't get it nor do I understand why he was taken away from all of us.

Since the news, I have been reading articles and comments about what people say about him. Yes he was a great person, had a great heart and always looking to the right thing by helping others and giving to others. He wasn't� Hollywood. Yeah he was rich and famous but he didn't let that change who he was. Like he said one time before, "It's a job and a great one at that, but it doesn't define who I am". He never did let fame go to his head.

I didn't know him personally, but I do know he was one of the good guys. You know when you just get the gut feeling about something, well mine was right about him. I wish I had had the chance to meet him one time.

A few years ago, Paul started his own Foundation to help others. ROWW. Reachout World Wide. He actually went to all these places to help people in times of need or disaster. I don't see a whole lot of famous people doing stuff like that., but he didn't care to jump in there and get his hand dirty.

I was reading an article today about Paul. The person was comparing him to James Dean. James Dean was before my time and I didn't know him. Yeah he may have been their legend, but to me Paul Walker is our Legend.

Paul Walker will always be in our hearts and minds. He will never be forgotten!
Add Comment:

Current Tags: Paul Walker

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



    charlax  71, Male, Arizona, USA - 744 entries
04
Jan 2014
12:43 PM EST
   

INcan BLinkin DInkin

INcan BLinkin DInkin

2014 means the calendar event of the end of the INcan world was incorrect

they stopped seeing events

we are safe from those Peruvians

just found a picture of a white cow in a blizzard eating snow

it was in a mosaic fruit jar on an INcan porch

wrapped in bay leaf to keep it fresh vegeterian style

they were blinded by the white BLinkin from the site

world war three will soon begin in 3500 is the end

DInkin INdians missed the period of time

they got the millennium mixed up with the fourth dimensional shift

perhaps the rotation of your yellow sun caused them to miss the drift

the age is upon us our descendants will fight the final conflict

that battle will result in the final Judgement

Mabus is kind of Neat for those who stufy will find it repast is sweet

unleavened with money for gas and oil is mixed with blood and sand

turn the time back for every INcan hand

the clock is BLinkin

eye am DInkin

INcan BLinkin DInkin

Tags: eye
Add Comment:

Current Tags: eye

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



    charlax  71, Male, Arizona, USA - 744 entries
01
May 2014
12:02 PM EST
   

The Dragonfly has a Birthday

The Dragonfly has a Birthday

The Dragonfly has a Birthday

April Twenty Four for NPM poetry

her smile lights in my heart

she calls to �me at times

she flutters her wings in love she makes me sing my love is secret but not disguised

she is a warrior and she is the world

she is unconcerned with petty theft

she makes me happy and never sad

she is my thrift and all my worth

on this day in May the dragonfly will play

and MAY she think of me this April Day

my Indian my love my wings my calling dove

will always answer with love

Tags: ici
Add Comment:

Current Tags: ici

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



    martytx07  37, Male, Texas, USA - 53 entries
11
Feb 2014
10:18 AM CST
   

Just an update

Wow...I didn't know it had been so long since I last updated! Well I think a lot has happened since my last entry. I am now working at the Mesquite center. I actually like it a lot. I am the CSA...I'm not even sure what my position was during my last entry. Dang I need to start typing in this thing more. I think it's amazing to just go back and read what you wrote before. Well anyways, let's see...I am working in Mesquite as the CSA...I have been the CSA for a while now actually but just transferred to Mesquite on the 27th of January I believe. I like it a lot...it's so much nicer and the employees there are so much more well behaved....well most of them. I'm sure there's going to be a couple that are going to deviate from the proper procedure but we just need to nip it in the butt to be honest. My sister had her baby in August. She's adorable. Little fat thing. Turtle just got a promotion so I'm proud of him for that. It's gonna be good that he makes more money now that he has a daughter he will have to provide for. Well I won't say much more here because I'm starving and need to get ready so I can go great breakfast with my sister and the baby probably.
Add Comment:

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



    splashberryblu  42, Female, Arkansas, USA - 91 entries
03
Mar 2017
4:25 PM CST
   

No Repair

Feeling distraught and in disrepair....Im not happy at all, Im doing my best at pretending but who am I kidding, this is garbage, straight trash, I shouldve been got rid of his inconsistent ass

�Starting to wonder if its really a prize by the look of my red, puffy..tear swollen eyes,
Im a dummy ...yeah you dont even have to say it..This heartbreak is getting to the point I can fake it, I cant glue it I cant even tape it...no repair..storage ready thats the only place for me...just waiting still hoping I will get chosen but everyone including me knows this is Bogus...

Got another lookin at me, textin me, callin me but no butterflies.. there just discontention and rolled eyes...

Puppy love shit in a Mid life ready body...
Tension, stress, occasional highs, plenty of lows...
Wanting vows but only getting lies...
Im sick of it I cant lie..Im sick about it I cant lie..
well I can but you wont believe it

No repair for this Ive gone to far...
guess until he loves me I'll just sit at the Bar...

1 comment(s) - 01:28 PM - 03/26/2017
Add Comment:

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



    DustyRose  45, Female, Indiana, USA - First entry!
02
Jun 2017
2:13 AM EST
   

What would you Do?

I have been in this relationship for a little over a year. I have forgiven him for cheating in the beginning when I was already living with him. We have come so far from them, but just recently I caught him talking shit about our relationship to a female friend. I confronted him about it and he was pissed said I was spying on him or getting all of his messages some way. All I did was wait for him to pass out and check his phone. I have tried everything to get passed all the other shit, but no matter what I do he makes me feel like it is all my fault, but can never give me an honest answer as to what I have done wrong. I know the old adage that if he is accusing me of shit it is what he is actually doing it. If that is the case then why keep me around if he wants something different?�
Add Comment:

Current Tags: cheated, clarity, help, Love, romance

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



    zenladybug  47, Female, Colorado, USA - 72 entries
14
Jan 2015
7:33 AM MST
   

New Leaf...

Here we are again, a new year and yet another new leaf being turned with hope and resignation. I feel like every year I say "This year is different!" but this year is... different. I feel older, more grown up, ready to face the world as woman with responsibilities. I have eliminated�most of my previous distractions (or they have eliminated me) and have been able to finally see how destructive all of the background nonsense was. How I put myself up on a shelf while I let others consume all of the attention. My plans for this year are much more realistic and reek less of flights of fancy. There may be a bit of the fanciful but their flights have been grounded and they remain firmly planted deep�within the earth, ready to sprout when condidtions are best.

�I believe the average person resolves to be more open to new possibilities in the new year but being open has never been my problem.� This will be a year of building slightly less permeable walls.� A year of realistic endeavors that feature myself as the star player and gives supporting roles to everyone else. Opening doors only large enough for me to squeeze through and mending all of the cracks and holes that let out the warmth. Really feeling the goodness of the world instead of just letting others describe it to me. I will give myself one gift everyday to acknowledge how far I've come and to fortify me for road ahead.

'It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's new life for me, and I'm feeling good'
Add Comment:

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



    WENDYWITCH  58, Female, California, USA - 5 entries
21
Jun 2014
4:01 PM PST
   

Do we Let go of the Past, forgive and forget? Or are we doomed to repeat the same mistakes if we do not remember the past? Is there some kinda of compromise, meeting in the middle that allows us to move on, yet not make same mistakes? What is the.real answer, can u do both?
1 comment(s) - 02:38 PM - 07/26/2014
Add Comment:

Current Tags: forgive, learning, letting go, mistakes, past

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



Matches: 9936 ... 831 | 832 | 833 | 834 | 835 | 836 | 837 | 838 | 839 | 840 ... Next Prev Last