soo...connor is coming today. in nine hours...more or less. oh my god. what have i done? what the hell have i done? i know that this isnt a good idea....i know that it isnt...but i did it anyway. why didi do it? do i still love him as much as i sometimes think that i do? IS this just a booty call? is that what we have become? is that what three years means to him (and to me) now? i dont think that i am going to be ok with this but hey...i got myself into this...im going to have to get myself out....what if he died on the way here? No…I don't want him to die…of course not. also….f*ck.
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