My Book Of Life

 
    
25
Jun 2009
9:04 PM EDT
   

Ok.. So..!

I�Know i posted an entry already but Im bored and i just need to write down all my feelings. Ok so today is some dude i met through myspace's graduation. I dont wanna say his name so lets call him M. Ok so he invited me but i couldnt go which sucks :P. And honestly idk theres just something about him that drives me crazy. Like i havent met him and i feel like im falling for a complete stranger. Hes Just the type of person i would love to hang out with or even better have as a boyfriend. Ive been single for such a long time it sucks not to have any body.!! You know i talk to alot of guys in my life and i text alot of guys but nothing compares to that one text from M. Just one little text messege from him makes my whole day.! Call me crazy but i really like this guy alot. Hes not the best looking but dude im falling for the person he is! Hes just perfect. Hes The type of guy i see myself dating and gosh.! he drives me crazy..! idk if he has a girlfriend but i honestly want him to myself! mine mine mine! I love those late phone calls and those text messeges that he says the sweetest things.! I just love the I.M's we used to have and i miss it all. I wish everything could honestly go back to the way it used to be with hhim. You know before that little fight we had.... Ughhh.... Boys......

Well besides boys my life's pretty good right now. Im entering high school in about 3 months. currently in summer vacation and Im pretty nervous. They say high school are the hardest years.! And I wonder if im going to change at all?? Today i went out with Reyna. We went to chinese food and then icecream n then we went to the park. We had those eternal girly conversations. You know we talked about boys and our life.! I love having a friend who i can relate to so much.!

Ok so theres this friend i have. Ive known her since the longest. Childhood friend like since babies. so many memories with her and seriously sooo many memories. And well yeah is she really being a friend when shes just using me when her other best friend isnt hanging out with her? Like she calls me to go out when she isnt hanging out with her other best friend. I hate it so much cuz she doesnt even pay attention to me when she hangs out with her. Like seriously! i hate it when she does that! Like if you want to hang out with me hang out with me.! Not just cuz ur other friend isnt here! And Idk I just feel like we are slowly growing apart! When we do hang out she acts like nothing and idk im just tired of it.! idk..??

I was reading other peoples public entries and Now i know im not the only one going through alot! Everyone is always going through tough times and so much drama! like Theres always those days when your like my life is so perfect!! Then theres those days when you dont even know why you exsist and you just wanna go hide under a rock!

Hey Patrick from spongebob needs a roomate right.! And i guess life is all about that. having ur ups and downs u know! Its all really hard.!!! Sometimes too much to bare!!

My mind is filled with so many emotions at times! And it irritates me! I just want to be happy and not worry about anything! Sometimes i think im shy because im afraid of what people are going to think of the real me. Im afraid to open up to others cuz at one point they might leave! ive lost so many people in my life they all end up walking away!! Im just scared of rejection..

And yeah.. Well I heard this saying, "If you want to be happy, Be" And I want to be happy. Who doesnt want to be happy right.!?? I love this site because i can express everything i feel! I keep a diary but i get really lazy to write everything i feel and i find typing easier. So I have to go now Cuz Idk lol..! I feel like im done here. I'll write on it tomorrow! i wont abandon you anymore.! Well hopefully lol.

I just need some excitment in my life for once.!

-Yours Karyna.

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