This is interesting... looked at my old Web sites. Here's one journal entry...
Damn... I love him so much
Blast from the past I checked out my old best friend's site. is there something wrong, still being hurt? It's sad...i wished through these past, what?....3-4 years should would have changed her tune. And she hasn't...she's still putting herself out there to get hurt. i wish she would grow up and stop putting herself into situations. we may not be friends, but i want nothing but the bestfor her
Nothing but private posts at this pt. keeps getting harder and harder every day....
It's not .... ....even abouthim being physically here at this pt. It's about knowing he's safe...that his safetyis secure...that it's there andhe's outta harms way. and there's no guarantee. it's what keeps me up at night.
I miss him, so much...
talked with him for a bit today. really wish i can shout to the world that im in love.
i'm so in love.
Can't stop twitching. I blame the smokes. I guess that's a sign I should quit??
Nah.
In office, as always. Need to do editing and all that jazz. Presentation next week and haven't started on it yet. Oh well. Maybe Sat.
Ummmmm.....not too much to report at this pt. I finally got to talk with casey again the other day, after a few days without hearing his voice on the other end of the phone : (
but all is good again. I'm scrambling to get his carepack out. I don't want it to seem I'm putting it off, bc I'm not. I literally have no tieeemmmppooo to do shit. Sucks. Time managment is a bitch.
Finally figured out what I'm doing my web pg on : ) Hopefully it works out. Also looking to start that organization on campus this semester. I can see how it may be impossible honestly at this pt with time and all, but I really want to. Hopefully I can get bites and all (which I really think I will...it's first of it's kind on campus). It'll be nice to put, that I started an organization on campus, and hopefully it'll continue on for years to come. : )
That's it for now I guess. Man, I need another cigarette....
2. You use an entire bottle of his cologne so you can smell him around you.
3. You get nervous every time the phone rings or you hear a knock at the door.
4. The shoes he left in the middle of the floor are now oddly comforting.
5. The postal clerk knows you by name.
6. You buy beef jerky every time you go to the grocery store.
7.You check your email every 5 minutes including in the middle of the night.
8. You have enough priority boxes, packing tape and customs forms for his entire unit.
9.You have a ton of friends with deployed soldiers who you've never actually met because they're all online.
10.You don't just tie a yellow ribbon around a tree outside, you tie one around your heart.
Attempting to write my paper for HSPA. I completely forgot about it.
Hillary Smith is chattering away on the phone, trying to contact a vollyball coach for her beat. Sharon Ross is yelling "what a fantastic story idea" in the background. Bill Bero is coughing by his desk, talking to his designer. And Matt is laughing like a hyenia.
Man, I'm going to miss this place.
Yeah, I had some rough patches (ok, a little more than "some") but this experiencehas been incredible. I have walked away from something. I can say Iworked here for summer,reported for the Times, had A1s (frontpg stories), got cussed atby sources, cried when Ifelt overwhelmed with 7 stories duewithintwo days, loved laughingwith fellow copy editors, felt part ofteam, gained some much incite from a 40 year vet copy editor to a 25 year old online editor....and so much more.
It'sFriday, mylast day here. It feels like I'll be back Monday, awaiting an assignment from one of my editors.
Bittersweet. Completely bittersweet.
Powerful winds shook homes and businesses as heavy rains poured over the region early Thursday morning, leaving more than 3,000 without power.
The National Weather Service issued a flood watch at 9:28 p.m. Wednesday night for Northwest Indiana and Northern Illinois. The watch generated quickly into a warning, from evening showers into overnight heavy rain between 2 to 5 a.m. for Lake and Porter counties.
The storm traveled southeast of Indiana, with Crown Point, Valparaiso, Schererville and Merrillville hardest hit with 1 to 2 inches of rain, said Tim Halback, of the National Weather Service in Romeoville. Counties in Northern Illinois received about 3 to 4 inches.
"Rains were heavy and worse when it got east into LaPorte," Halback said.
Local public works and police departments around the region reported few structural damages or flooding from the storm's constant rain that left minimal street flooding but downed numerous trees.
The Crown Point Police Department reported that a truck hit a utility pole off of U.S. 231 after the storm, causing more power outages.
NIPSO spokesman Mike Charbonnea said, as of Thursday early afternoon, about 500 Indiana businesses and homes were still without power. Both Valparaiso and Crown Point ranked highest in amount of customers without power.
It took years for St. Patrick Parish in East Chicago to get back on its feet.
With about a $80,000 debt, deteriorating building conditions and dwindling numbers of parishioners, its community feared inevitable closure.
"It was pitiful," Rev. Fernando de Cristobal, senior priest at the parish, said of the building's condition. "It's what happens to intercity churches in a depressed area."
After years of financial struggle, the parish community obtained a newfound hope as its debt nears "steady, almost cleared" years later.
De Cristobal believes this hope reflects a group of dedicated, diverse individuals -- its parishioners.
It required constant involvement with fundraisers and collections from the small number of active parishioners, he said, to get debts paid and the building back into working order.
"The spirits of the community kept the parish alive and thriving," De Cristobal said. "The parish is ours. Not one person can keep it alive alone."
De Cristobal was assigned to the parish nearly 10 years ago. Faced with an outstanding debt lasting almost 22 years, he knew changes were needed. De Cristobal preached the importance of sacrifices, donations and the parish's needs during homilies and saw an immediate response. Frequent financial updates kept the congregation informed, and the parish alive.
He also noted steady "waves" in contributions and attendance the past few years.
"[The] population changes. Finances change. [New] parishioners come around with low income," he said. "Anything that happens in society like the loss of jobs, the collapse of job industries ... it's a big impact on all churches."
Out the 370 registered parishioners, about 120 to 150 currently submit a weekly donation. An average of 2,000 is donated from weekly collections, whereas expenses are averaged at $4,000.
The parish cannot survive on weekly collections alone, he said. De Cristobal attributes the steady financial status to many factors, including donated profits from various committees that host annual festivals, special fundraisers and even themed luncheons.
One active committee - the Guadalupanas - hosts monthly breakfasts and luncheons, and usually profits about $350-$400 per event to donate, said treasurer Connie Roque. Though it's not much, it can be said that it helps out to some extent, she said.
The parish community is also working on an evangelization drive, a program sending parishioners around neighborhoods to promote the church.
"The church has a future, and the future is bright," Rev. William O'Toole said, the parish's newest pastor and administrator. "It's a sign of people willing to make a difference ... not just [for] the parish but committed to East Chicago and a bright future."
He should be boarding his plane any moment. I wish I were able to fly out there, and surprise him. That, I know, would work wonders for us. My foolishness has gotten the best of me. My stubbornness. My tendencies to act adolescent. Shame on me for the wrong decisions I've made.
I hate how I attributed to his sadness today. I shouldn't have let him onto the driveway. He didn't need to hear any of that. I take full blame for that. Shame on me again.
My eyes are swollen, I'm falling asleep at the keyboard and have no make up on.
My sister did say I was nothing to her. That killed me. They called me Lupe ... that put more shame upon me.
Shame on me.
All I want to do is to be in someone's arms -- someone who cares ... someone who I can feel reassurance from.
I want my mommy. I want my sister. But neither of them have it in them to hug someone who's done them wrong.
I feel I've lost my best friend. But I haven't, I know. Casey is my best friend. Not having that someone there a moment away ... can really take a toll on someone. He really has become a big part of my every day.
I can feel his sadness, right inside my heart. I want to take that away from him, so he won't feel that pain. He doesn't deserve to feel that way.
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