I have a friend and co-worker who passed away Thursday. She was in an accident two days before Christmas and she was two months pregnant. She had her baby boy two weeks before she died. I have so many emotions over this. I truly believed she would eventually go home and be with her son. All the doctor's believed that. Now her son will never hear her voice. Never hear his mom say "I love you". I feel for her fiance' who was so devoted and so loving. I feel for her father who stayed vigiliant with his daughter. Leaving only to bury his mother who died less than a month before his daughter. I worry for this young life. I miss her...oh how I miss her.
I wanted to post something since it has been a little while. I wish I could say everything is all better. I just thought that I would pull away for a minute. I shut myself down. No more cutting. Not since the leg incident. I have been contemplating a job change. I work in a Starbucks but it is inside a casino...run by the casino. We dont get the perks that the free standing Starbucks receive. I am lead and trainer. Having said that...I havent trained a soul since we opened. I want to, I should have but they just dont give me the opportunity to do what they title says I should be doing. So, a new Starbucks is opening not to far from me. I wanted to look into it. My boss found out I was checking it out and wasnt happy with me at all. She asked me if I would be interested in a Supervisor position with the Food and Beverage Department. I have thought about this and I dont think it is the best thing for me. The hours and having to be the boss over people that I work with or have worked with in F&B. My boss also mentioned VIP host. I thought that would be more comfortable for me. However, when I tried to check into that postion. Find out what it actually entails....I cant get any answers. I asked the boss for that job if I could "shadow" a VIP host on my day off. She never got back to me on it. Also I am thinking about taking classes to become a table game dealer. I am not sure what I should do. As far as husband and all that is left of our marriage..I have yet to turn in the application. I just dont want to put my sister in a position to hire him and he doesnt show up or quits. I do have it ready and I think I will give it to her tomorrow. I feel so numb. I cant seem to make up my mind with anything. Anyway, this entry is waaaay too long. I will write again soon.
Happy Mother's Day to all.
