smb's Journal

 
    
02
Feb 2008
11:02 AM MST
   

WAITING...

So, here it is Sat. I've been sssooo sad the past few days, just knowing I gave my heart to Cory and he isn't sure if he wants it! I do want to make it work with him. Thurs. night I shared with him in more detail, how much I love and appreacite him and want him forever! I just layed it out on the line and let him know how I really feel! I told him I DO want to remarry someday because I know that is what is right in God's eye and I want to be pleasing to God in all things! I also shared I do really think I would have another baby! If everything was right~! Again, I reminded him my heart was so hurt about this. I just can't understand why he is "playing this game" with my heart. He seemed to want me for over a year and now when I finally get my act together and say I will be commited to him (even in marriage) he freaks!!! and backs away~ I really have been pathetically SAD, BUMMED and a little DEPRESSED! BUT- after talking to a few friends (and Thank YOU GOD for my friends! I LOVE EM) and re-reading some Dr. Phil (I don't need to be desperate!) I have been calmer! So, then,,, when I was calmed down I was able to think about God instead myself! I was led to go searching for the Word that would get me through this! Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is Close to the brokenhearted!" SO, this tells me GOD is near to me and I need to be Listening to Him instead of focusing on myself! AND this is the best! This verse literally popped out at me! I read it over and over, Psalm 27:14 "Waitfor the Lord, Be strong and take heart, waitfor the Lord!"Then I was led to pray! I whole heartedly, closed my eyes, held my hands up and prayed that he would give me strengh to be patient and wait onHIM to decide my fate with Cory. I realized, itisn't my choice. IF Cory isNOT the one the Lord has picked for me thenHe will let me know in dew time. I need to wait on theLord!Isn't God so amazing, he is teaching me something right now!! As I wait,,,, He's teaching me that ICAN WAIT! and I can only grow through this situation.
 Add comment
1 comment(s) - 08:11 PM - 02/04/2008
Add Comment:

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )





smb's Profile

  • Username: smb
  • Gender / Age: Female, 49
  • Location: USA - Wyoming
    •