sexiicupcake's Journal

 
    
16
Mar 2007
5:53 AM EDT
   

heyy everyone its me again..So yea me and Roger realized that we arent really ready to have sex.. we realized this because when he wanted to I was scared and crying and then when I wanted to he no longer did.. Like he was annoyed or something..Yea but o well I guess we will Just do it when we are ready and when we are both in the mood..ha ha ..so yea the thing is I wonder why I got so scared.. Like I wanted to soo bad and I told him that and then I just started thinking about how it was going to hurt and how I was going to bleed cause it would be my first time.. And I just paniced. But honestly please tell me that some of you have gone through what I am goin through..And you wanna fuck real bad untill it comes time to and you get real scared cause thats what happens to me and now i feel like he hates me because I backed out.. But yea tonite i mite have to babysit my baby neice.. but it'll just be me and my friend Jess because my bro in law doesnt want my friend watson to come because he thinks that she will have guys over.. So he said sorry but that she couldnt come.. O well the only hard thing is tellin her that she cant come cus she will think that it is me and that I just dont want her to come and some how I will be the big mean bitch..lol..But yea.. So I've been kinda sick lately.. Like really but today I woke up a little bit earlier and threw on some makeup.. I will tell you that I look soo much better now.. People mite not even be able to tell that I am sick.. I decided that I need to go on a diet.. I want to lose 10 pounds.. then I will be great.. But yea I decided Im going to start runnin more and actually exercise.. Soo lets just see what happens.. well hey im gunna go but let me know what you all think..byee..
xoxo,
Judi
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15
Mar 2007
6:43 AM EDT
   

Heyy everyone another exciting day at school.. Not really.. But only 1 more day this week..yesss..soo ok we had an hour delay today because the electricity was out thats always exciting..But yea soo this kid Dave he came back to Struthers for a while and me and my friend Jess were lookin for him cause we wanted to see him and hangout.. So yea well because we used to hang all the time in the summer.. I will admit that he is a very hott boii.. but yea soo my friend Watson got mad because we wanted to hangout with him.. She was like well why did you try to get ahold of him.. i was like to hangout duhh why else.. She is only mad because he never calls her to hangout and he only calls me and jess.. I swear watson can be a huge bitch sometimes.. So to make me feel bad bout wanting to hangout with dave she was like soo how are you and Roger.. I was like were fine y u askin.. She acts like itll be a sin if I hangout with dave even though Im with Roger... OK well unlike her I have self controll.. Ya know.. But yea no I swear one time she fucked this dude on my trampoline and then left the condom under the trampoline.. Isnt that nasty.. yea.. Then my dad found it and thought that it was mine.. I was like no thats not mine.. i dunno whose it is.. Thank God he believed me.. Its just sometimes I dont know if she is a real true friend.. And ill admit I think that all the time.. But heyy Im gunna go but tell me wat you think do you think itll be fine for me to hangout with dave..

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14
Mar 2007
6:12 AM EDT
   

Heyy everyone ok today is ok besides the fact that I have womanly problems..lol..OK well I guess this Friday me and my friends are just having a girls nite which is cool I guess but also makes me wonder what Roger is doin.. Yea I guess you can say I have trust issues.. But honestly wouldnt you if you got cheated on and the dude that you were with for 7 months cheated on you with your friend and then never told you.. Yea can you say ass hole.. Im sick of guys like that.. But yea no I know Roger wouldnt do anything but honestly I just dont know why I get so concerned.. I will admit that the only guy I ever fell in love with was the ass who cheated on me and its hard because im fallin in love with roger and i Just dont think that I cantake it rite now because what if he ends up hurting me you know.. I just have no idea.. And heyy heres something I need answers to Ok me and Roger both wanna have sex but the only problem is that we are both virgins.. Yea.. Soo I mean is it gunna be complicated for us to be able to or wat.. well Let me know wat you think cause im lost and have no idea wat to do.. I need some good advice.. i mean do u all just think my life is completely fucked up or what

2 comment(s) - 01:53 PM - 03/14/2007
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14
Mar 2007
9:10 AM EDT
   

Heyy everone its me again.. Just stoppin by to say hello.. And I need your guys oppionions about everything.. Ok soo that ass hole aiden who cheated on me.. Well I will admit that untill today I had no idea that he slept with my friend Ragan.. So I texted him trying to be nice and just asked how he was and shyt and I just happened to get out of him how he actually didfuckher which really upsets me.. Then he told me that he wouldnt apologize for what he did.. Can you be a bigger ass hole.. Well Heyy do u think I did the rite thing by tellin him that I forgive him for what he did and that I dont care that he fucked her.. That i just wanna solve our differences and become FRIENDS again.. But just friends nothing else.. But then I got pissed and told him to fuck off and to go fuck another 8th grader.. Yea the girl that he cheated on me with was 15 but in 8th grade.. Yea..soo i just dunno.. I will always have feelings for him and I know that its just I wish that I didnt have to.. I know you will always remember your first love and thats what sucks because I dont want to remeber him forever.. i will admit that he was the one guy that I tried everything with.. Meaning well you should know and its hard to know that he fucked your friend while you were together.. Even if you didnt findout till 2 months after it happened.. I honestly want to hate him but for some reason i just cant.. I will admit that I do love my bf and that honest to God he is the BEST thing that has happened to me.. That yea well compared to the losers hes great.. The only bad thing is he got a DUI a couple months ago soo now hes in diversion and doesnt have his license so i dont see him as much and that sux soo bad..well Heyy im gunna go but pleaseeee tell me what u think i should

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13
Mar 2007
6:12 AM EDT
   

heyyy everyone im new to this diary.. And i just want to inform you on me and my life and a lot of things that I have gone through. Ok my name is Judi and Im 17. i live in a shit hole town called Struthers Ohio.. It is a very boring town. I have a wonderful boii friend Roger.. He is great and would do anything for me.. Well sometimes..ha ha.. Ok well i am a partii girl.. I love em and I do get a lil crazii.. Ok I have some great friends who i love to death and woud prolly do anything for.. But yea i have this problem holding onto relationships.. Well But its not really me.. Im the one who gets cheated on.. Ok well Ive been with Roger for almost 2 months which is great.. But before him was this kid aiden that i fell in love with.. I honestly did and he was the only guy that i have fallin in love with but it was hard and I found out that he had sex with my friend and that was it.. Honestly i never knew how fast you could fall out of love untill that day.. But i have moved on and it was hard and still is because i am so scraed that im gunna fall in love with Roger and i just dont know if I am ready because wat if I get hurt again.. But I guess everything happens for a reason.. OK well I will tell you all that i am still a virgin but my bf kinda wants to do it and soo i want to too honestly i just get a lil scared and Friday we both realized that we werent ready.. but no I just dunno wat to do and my life is pretty crazyy soo tell me wat you think .. Bye

2 comment(s) - 06:24 PM - 03/18/2007
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sexiicupcake's Profile

  • Username: sexiicupcake
  • Gender / Age: Female, 29
  • Location: USA - Ohio
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    SEXIICUPCAKE's Interests:

    About Me: Hi my name is Judi Im 17 I live in Struthers Ohio and I am a Junior at Struthers High School.. I have a wonderful bf who i adore and care soo much about i also have wonderful friends that i would do anything for..I have a pretty gay job but atleaste it gets me money.. I have a great family and thats me

    Interests: I like hanging out with friends, Shoppin, Partying it up a bit.. Fridays are the bests with my girls..

    Favorite Music: Country, punk Rock rap.. Pretty much everything...

    Favorite Movies: I like the cute movies that are also sad..and scary movies..ahhh