Standing Inside, Whilst Looking From the Out

 
    
09
Oct 2011
8:05 PM EDT
   

Have you ever sat on the side?

Have you ever forced yourself to smile, while tears trembled behind your eyes? Have you ever laughed, while you throat wanted to curddle a shrill? Have you ever stood tall, while you want to be on the floor curled in a ball of hurt? Have you ever said "love", while you felt hate? Have you ever tried to be yourself, while others try to form you? Have you found the answers? We want to please. We want to hide. We want to be brave. We want to change our feelings. We want to fit. What if I don't please you? What if I want to be seen? What if I am fine with being scared? What if I can't change my thoughts? What if I want to be me? The other day I sat along side the bleachers of my high schools homecoming dance and watched the boy I was going to ask, dance with a girl whom has repeatedly interferred with my relationships. As sitting with tears and a combination of black mascara trickling down my cheeks I realise that I don't need anybody. I am fine sitting alone with my thoughts. Not that they are nice to me, but this way I don't have to worry about anyone hurting me other than myself.
2 comment(s) - 03:18 PM - 02/27/2012
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  • Username: Sissy7
  • Gender / Age: Female, 27
  • Location: USA - Minnesota
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    About Me: Hi, I'm Sissy. If you read my entries then you will notice I have a different writing technique then most journal entries, I write a saying/question(s) that I try to make soo others can relate to. Underneath that I will write what it means and why I wrote it. I love to write and not all will make sense you will have to look at it from an open mind. I am 14 and go to a big high school (well big to me) I have many friends but feel as if I'm standing upon the outside. That is what most of my writings will be about. I am an actress, so somethings will probably be dramatic. Please give me feedback I love to hear peoples opinions and thrive off of your critism. Love, Sissy

    Interests: Theatre, surviving high school, being myself, writing, drama (acting, not the over rated girly stuff), singing and dance.

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