martytx07's Journal

 
    
16
Apr 2007
1:07 PM CST
   

Ok, soooo anyways, nothing has been going on too much. Umm, I haven't really written in a while...well I only missed one week but I guess that's a lot when I only get these things four times a month. So anyways, umm, over the weekend I didn't do too much so yeah, and I'm debating whether or not I should go to prom. I haven't asked anyone so I'm sorting of thinking oh no, it's getting too late but I don't really care to go. It's senior prom for me so I'm thinking that I really should go...I don't know, lol. Umm, I missed school today because I just didn't wake up. It's a good thing I didn't go because I don't know how I would've gotten home. Rose took Dillion home but his freaking mom wasn't home so she stayed in Waco and she's barley coming back right now. So yeah, oh and she still has Dillion. I hope that Dillion really goes to school tomorrow because TAKS and I really think he needs to take that. His mom needs to get her priorities straight...makes me mad to see other people in control of his life, I just really want the best for him. I think at times I'm hoping for too much because I want him to be more than what I ever was both academically and athletically. A lot of times I think I push him too much because I feel that no one really pushed me, I mean, I think I'm doing really great in school don't get me wrong but I think if I had more encouragement or people wanting to help me when i was younger I could've done so much better. I don't know, I just hope the best for him. I ask him about the future and he says he doesn't want to go to college and when he says that it really makes me mad. I tell him what kind of life he will live but he doesn't seem to care. I see kids like him all around me at school but I didn't think he would become like that. I don't know. Ok, well let me get of that subject, Friday is Senior Breakfast and I paid $13 for that ticket so it better be a pretty damn good breakfast. I'm not sure what I'm gonna wear though, lol. Just throw on some slacks and a dress shirt and some dress shoes I guess. Anyways, so hopefully that will be fun. Umm, the end of the 6 weeks finally came to an end on Friday and I'm not sure what I got in some classes. I think I did bad in English because...I'm not sure if I talked about this in another journal, probably not, but anyways, I didn't do this assignment, daily grade homework, and so that's a 0 in the grade book and it's killing me and we couldn't do it so I'm like stressed out about it. I'm just hoping that I make at least an 80. If anything lower than that I'm gonna be PISSED! Oh well, that's enough talking, later guys. Ok, and I decided that I want to get more personal on this thing and I just hope that my family doesn't find this, lol. I'm gay! Yeah, shocking! Ok, so anyways, I've known I've been gay forever and I'm not out to anyone other than people online, haha, how pathetic? I really wanna come out because I think when I do that I can be more true to myself and people around me. And I'm taking a psychology class and I think the stuff in there is really interesting. I myself think it's ridiculous to think that gays choose this "lifestyle" Believe me, I don't think I would want to choose living a life where I have to be afraid of what my family and everyone else is going to think about me. Well anyways, the book talks a lot about things that are different in gay males compared to straight males. Physical differences <--Ok, well if anyone ever reads my journals you would've seen that it stopped there because my sister came in and of course what I was writing was very personal! So let me continue...Physical differenences that are similar to females so it's not something that people just choose. I never believed that I chose to be gay but I have at times felt that it was wrong. I know, it's stupid because there would be like no way I would've chosen to live my life as a gay person. It was something I'm guessing I was born with just as people were born with blue eyes, blonde hair, etc. So yeah, that's about all I'm going to write. Nothing really more to say :) Lataz!
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martytx07's Profile

  • Username: martytx07
  • Gender / Age: Male, 38
  • Location: USA - Texas
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    MARTYTX07's Interests:

    About Me: Just a normal gay dude from Texas. Genuinely a nice guy who loves to smile :Dh

    Interests: Computers, music, reading, video games, & YOUTUBE!!!

    Favorite Music: Country - Carrie Underwood, Martina McBride, Faith Hill, Kenny Chesney, Toby Keith, Keith Urban, Blake Shelton, LeAnn Rimes, Dixie Chicks, Pop - KELLY CLARKSON!!! James Blunt, Simple Plan, Natasha Bedingfield, Britney Spears, Nelly, NB Ridaz, Frankie J, Usher, Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, and A LOT more that I can't think of right now!!!

    Favorite Movies: Titanic, The Day After Tomorrow, The Notebook, Scream, Something About Mary, Butterfly Effect, 10 Things I Hate About You, Hairspray (Oringal with Ricky),

    Favorite Television: American Idol, Heroes, American Dad, Prison Break, The Hills, I Love NY, Ugly Betty, Simpsons, Family Guy, Nip/Tuck

    Favorite Books: Harry Potter, and other books that I had to read for school: Animal Farm, 1984, Their Eyes Were Watching God, and some other books.