darkraven's Journal

Mar 2008
11:54 AM GMT


I wish I had someone to tell this stuff to.

�But you can't say these you things. not out loud.. not to people who love you.� They will just be hurt, so you say nothing.

�But how I am meant to resolve it if I don't ever talk about it, or admit it?

�My inability to go out, to use the phone, to rarely be able to communicate more than a sentance online.. these things are real.� They are limiting.� They are things that much as I am striving to change, are something I can not ignore.� Plus, as bad as these things are to live with, they come with an associated cost that just makes it even worse.

�It costs me the people I love.� Because they don't understand.� They think I don't bother. That I haven't bothered.� The fact that I have pushed beyond my limits to make as much contact as I have is meaningless. Because it's not enough.� It never will be enough.

�And I am irrelevent.

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Current Tags: fear, isolation, pain

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darkraven's Profile

  • Username: darkraven
  • Gender / Age: Female, 49
  • Location: United Kingdom