ampogue01's Journal

Nov 2009
6:24 PM EDT

& I let him hurt me again

Last Monday Mike text me & asked me if I was seeing anyone. I said no & he asked if I would like to do something. I said I would love to. He came over I made dinner, we played w/ Aleea, watched a movie, & we went to bed. We had sex 4 times that night & he seemed to search for me all night to hold me. He smiled & seemed so happy. I even asked before we did everything if we would be ok after & he said no. The next day we briefly texted each other by Thursday he said he didn't think we would work. I asked lets just date & take out time no preasure he said he didn't think it would work but also said he would think about it. Sunday I asked when I picked up AJ if he still felt the same. He said yes. After I got home I called him to talk & said I truelly believe we could make this work. He said he was more compatible w/ Mindy... The woman 3 days earlier he said was 1/2 the woman I am. Maybe I should move back to Rockford & smoke crack & then I will be more compatable. Our family is worth saving to me but not him. I dont know how to let go..,.. I do know I wont let him close to me again. I wont answer any text that remotely talks about us because it is nothing but a head game. I dont deserve that... I wish I had chosen a man that would put his family before anything to have children w/ He says we fought to much & doesn't thinnk it could have changed enough. Why not try? Better yet why the hell do I care. Why can't I move on &�find someone that loves me unconditionally. Does that only exist between parents &�children? Some much goes though my head. I cant sleep... I was finally getting better & told him I was happy. I guess he just couldn't let that be... I can't wait for the day that he comes back & I can look him in the face &�tell him no NEVER AGAIN!

1 comment(s) - 07:23 AM - 11/18/2009
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ampogue01's Profile

  • Username: ampogue01
  • Gender / Age: Female, 39
  • Location: USA - Florida
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