SCR3AMM3ALOVES0NG

 
    
22
Jul 2008
10:28 AM PDT
   

J0URNAL ENTRY 0NE - Father How Long Is Forever?

�Dear Journal,

�When you were little did you ever realize when you started living? When everything was happy and free. It was like a bird flying freely in the sky. How long is forever? How long can someone love you? I remember my dad. He would make me smile when i cried. He would lay down with me before the first day of school. He would spoil me with stuff when I felt disgusting. I wanna go back to where i felt comfortable with my family where it was quiet and safe. Where I felt what was like heaven? He left me and told me he was going on vacation. My dad is the kindest person you would ever meet. Yet, I never knew he had a dumb side. He lend this woman 80,000 dollars. WHICH IS THE STUPIDIEST FUCKING SHIT I'VE EVER FUCKING HEARD. My mom is struggling with money and i dont know what to do. My mom is like superwoman and thats what i admire about her. Yet she can be so weak. Back to the main problem. My dad lend this woman 80,000 dollars for what reason i have no idea. It doesnt make sense do you know what you can do with that money? HE DOESNT EVEN WANT TO SUE HER HE LET HER RUN AWAY WITH THAT MONEY AND SHE NEVER PAID HIM BACK. MY DAD IS SO STUPID BUT I LOVE HIM WITH MY DEAR HEART. Does he love me? i dont know. My mom asked him do you love that woman more than your kids? he didnt say anything I remember when he said briana i love you forever but im not sure now. He probably doesnt care about me and my sister anymore. He thinks im just his daughter from back then. You only have one life to live sweetie dont waste it. I dont wanna have to suffer like my mom. I dont want to live a life like my mom. And im holding back the tears and im scared. Im scared that Im not gonna have a good childhood. Geez its so hard my mom pretends everything's ok but it's not. My dad doesnt care about me i guess he never has I guess.. when he said I love you he didnt mean it.�Im so depressed and I cant even believe this. He doesnt even wanna give my mom money =[ I will surpass my mom I will. Im not gonna have a life like her. Im going to be a future psychologist. And I WILL GET MARRIED AND BE HAPPY.

Tags: doyouloveme? love heartbroken frustrated
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1 comment(s) - 04:08 AM - 07/23/2008
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